


Whispering Voices • Loki

by Angmar



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-31
Updated: 2019-05-01
Packaged: 2019-05-16 09:45:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 43
Words: 30,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14808935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angmar/pseuds/Angmar
Summary: Aella believes her life is over when she is struck by lightning. Still she wakes up in the hospital. At first sight nothing seems wrong with her, until she finds out she has infallible reflexes and never becomes tired. There however is a disadvantage: she sleeps no longer and hears voices - the voices of dying people. Doubting her mental health she sees only one option: to follow the whispering voices.Aella goes looking for the source of the whispers, assisted by three divine creatures, who all have their own reasons to help her - or pretend to do so.





	1. Prologue

_A roll of thunder rumbles out across the plain. The ground quakes beneath my feet. I take two steps aside, mud and blood splash. A bolt of lightning streaks across the black sky, lighting up one of the seven dragon heads. It's raining too hard to see if they're all still intact._

_"For Odin!" I yell. My throat feels sore from screaming. I lash out with my sword, and it's deflected by stone scales. Teeth clamp around my arm, and the ground disappears beneath my feet._

_Pain, indescribable pain. The monster releases me and I am flung through the air. My arm - my arm is torn off! Blood gushes down, spatters upon my sisters who fight beneath me. There are bodies, as far as the eye can see. The stench of death is choking me. Odd. It never has before. Is it different now that I, myself, am dying? I try to beat my wings, but the pain takes away all forms of control. I hit the muck, which has an iron taste. Panting and crying I crawl away, looking for shelter, a place where I can die peacefully._

_There is no peace on a battlefield, where thousands of heroes die without a chance to see Valhalla. Someone kneels down beside me. It is a young woman, with raven black hair and sky-blue eyes that are brimming with tears. "Let me help you, milady." She holds a golden object in her hands. "Breathe your last sigh into this. Then..."_

_"Be silent, you scoundrel!" Anger flares up. "Did you really think I wouldn't recognize you?" The pain that strikes my heart is sharper than that of the stump of my shoulder._

_The lovely smile disappears and the shape changes into that of the black-haired god. His face is pale and his eyes flash between the bloody waterfall and my face._

_"You betrayed me. You betrayed everyone." I breathe shakily. "I should have known. Somehow I have always known this day would come."_

_He doesn't show an ironic smile, but looks over his shoulder. "You think I did this?"_

_"Of course... I... do."_

_He hovers over me, then presses his lips against my forehead. Fazed by incomprehension, I search for his eyes._ _"You're wrong, then." He wraps his arms around me and the next moment we are in a quiet field. "Here, you can die." He smooths my hair, then he stands up. Before I can blink, he is gone._

_Loki could have saved my life._

_He didn't._


	2. Ice Queen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Aella put her pen down and stared at the lines she had written. She felt her chest tighten, as if her heart was pumping liquid metal instead of blood, which was slowly clotting.

Writing it down didn't help. She still had the feeling that she was really on the verge of dying. She wasn't physically hurt, but sensed shadows that crept toward her, every heartbeat a little closer.

It had started with dreams like this. They were more than dreams, they felt so realistic. Hours later they were still on her mind; and they were always the same.

Today she had decided to write them down. Maybe there was a scholar deep inside of her. Was this how writers created their bestsellers? Writing had never interested her. The prospect of writing a thesis already cramped up her fingers. Writing essays caused sleepless nights. The words never flowed from her pen.

Now, they ran on the page like water. Now it felt like someone had guided her hand and she couldn't shake off the feeling that she had been there on the battlefield, staring both helplessly and angrily in the ice blue eyes of that young man. A shiver ran down her spine.

Her chest stung, as if someone really had betrayed her. Was this what they called a vision? A harbinger of something that was going to happen? There were no men in her life, not even a brother or a father.

Was this just an unfounded fear for the date she had tonight? With Hayes, who was after her for almost a year now and who would tonight hopefully discover that he was wasting his time? She hated that he was so persistent – even more than she was. After ten rejections he had asked her out again. And she had agreed with a deep sigh.

Aella closed the notebook. Today was Saturday. She had finished her homework yesterday and she didn't know what to do. She had moved to the city for college, but had never succeeded in making friends. At the insistence of others, she had been a member of a sorority for a while, but she had stopped going since she didn't enjoy the activities. She just didn't fit in. She didn't feel the need to get drunk or to go to bed late. And for some reason she always felt sad at parties. Did the loneliness bother her after all? In high school she had had friends, but after she had moved, the friendship had withered. Maybe that was the reason she had agreed with a date with Hayes. So that she wasn't alone for one evening.

* * *

At half past six, Hayes picked her up. A self-confident smirk was drawn on his sharp face. Did he really think he had a chance with her? He was arrogant, cocky, and haughty. She must be just another conquest in his eyes.

"I am glad you are finally giving me the chance to get to know you better." He showily opened the door of the car.

Aella sat in the passenger seat. She couldn't think of any answer that didn't sound rude, so she said nothing at all.

"How has your day been?" Hayes asked when he started the car. He looked at her from his peripheral.

Aella shrugged and looked through the window. She wished she could just get hit by a truck. Those dreams were interrupting her thoughts, and this "date" wasn't making anything better.  
Hayes continued talking tirelessly, describing a game he had bought and going on about how good he was. Aella kept looking outside, to the facades of the buildings and the shiny advertising boards.

Secretly, she hoped Hayes had enough of her before they had arrived at the restaurant. That hope was dashed when he grabbed her arm before they entered the restaurant.

"It would be nice if you really gave me a chance, Aella. I have never dated such an independent girl."

Aella pulled her arm back. "I just think you're boring. I'm sorry."

He still didn't give up. "At least you said something." He flashed a wolfish smile. "I'm glad we can both be honest with each other." He took her hand and pulled her through the door. 'Well, Ice Queen, after you."


	3. An Unforgettable Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

In silence, Aella watched how Hayes took and hung up her coat . Then he showed a sparkling smile and laid a hand on her lower back. Softly he pushed her across the floor, deeper into the restaurant.

She could understand why he believed he was likable; but in her eyes he was too smooth, too well-rounded. Although she didn't have any past relationship to compare this to. The last three years of high school she had been in love with someone she would never want to be with long-term. She wouldn't be surprised when he turned out to be in jail, and in all these years she hadn't found out what was so interesting about him. Perhaps it just felt safe, swooning over someone she would never get close to. She shook her head. She didn't even know if her feelings had been real. Maybe she had just wanted to talk about a boy, like her friends.

Aella sat in her chair before Hayes could pull it out for her and crossed her legs. A little uncomfortably she watched him take a seat in front of her. The date already felt awkward, and the evening had just begun. She hoped the waiter would soon hand her a menu, so she could hide behind it.

"Have you ever been on a date before?", Hayes asked. He leaned his elbows on the table and intertwined his fingers.

"Well, you don't shy away from personal questions, do you?"

"I get the feeling you're not very fond of small talk." What did he expect from her? She didn't want to tell him this was her first date. He was already too full of himself.

"Nobody was as persistent as you were.", she hums. "And you? Are you playing date-bingo with your friends?"

He moved his eyebrows up and down. "I almost have a full card."

She couldn't help but grin. She liked his sharp-mindedness. It made the date a little less uncomfortable.

* * *

It became a nice evening. There were few awkward silences and she enjoyed having someone to talk to and laugh with. Only when Hayes had paid the bill and moved outside again, she realized she considered the connection between them as something else. "Do you want to take a walk?"

Aella suppressed a sigh. "I don't mind. I like your company. But I don't _like_ you – not in the way I think you are hoping for. Just so you know." She looked at him. Hopefully he wouldn't be difficult.

He showed an optimistic grin and took her arm. "I have seen you smile a few times today. It may surprise you, but I am easily satisfied."

Aella smiled. Was it possible something else would grow out of this? A friendship? Was that even possible when one had feelings for the other, and the other did not? Or was it not that bad? She didn't dare to ask how he really felt about her. Some answers she preferred not to know.

They walked to a nearby park. The grass was sloppy, it must have rained. She hadn't noticed.

"Did you grow up here?" Hayes asked.

She shook her head. "No, and I don't like city life much. Unfortunately this is the only piece of nature." She nodded at the square piece of grass on which grew a few trees.

Hayes's lips moved, but the words did not reach her. All of a sudden the night sky tore open and there was a flash of white light. The next moment Aella felt a burning pain that even scorched her thoughts.

Then there was nothing.


	4. Her Ice Walls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hayes' POV

His whole body quivered. What the fuck just happened? Helplessly Hayes stared at the girl on the ground. His thoughts couldn't process the events. It had seemed as if lightning struck her, but there were no thunder clouds. The thunder did not roar, nor was there lightning. Still he had seen a flash, and now she was on the ground, motionless.

He tore himself away from his bewilderment. "Aella?" His voice cracked. What if she was dead? He shook her shoulders. "Aella!"

Nearby people ran towards them. Hayes ignored the questions they fired at him and knelt beside her. She was still breathing, but for how long? How many people survived a lightning strike without permanent damage? It felt as if he was choking. What could he do?

A man knelt beside her and a woman called an ambulance. Hayes kept sitting next to her, although it felt like he saw everything from a distance. It had been horrible. The bright flash, her shaking body, the way she fell to the ground...

Hayes didn't know how much time had passed before an ambulance stopped in front of them. Two paramedics came out of the vehicle, checked her vital functions and lifted her onto a gurney.

"I believe this young man was with her.", The woman who had called the ambulance placed a hand on his shoulder. "He must be in shock."

"Come, ride with us."

Hayes wasn't able to object. Quietly, he climbed in the car and stared at Aella's pale face.

"What happened?" the paramedic urged carefully after the doors of the vehicle had closed.

"She... she was struck by lightning."

"Lightning?", the paramedic asked surprised.

"Yes!" A sudden fit of rage overwhelmed him, even though he did not know where it came from. Suddenly, he really realized she could die. A power surge like that couldn't be good for her heart.

"Hmm, there are no burn wounds," the paramedic mumbled. "I'll do an EKG."

Hayes bit on the nail of his little finger. He wondered whether he had to call somebody. But who? She had no friends at the university and he had no idea how he could contact her family. That would have to wait until they were in the hospital.

If she made it that far.

On the echocardiogram there were no abnormalities. Still Aella's condition hadn't changed when they arrived at the hospital. They rushed her inside. In a hurry he was directed to the waiting area of the E.R.

* * *

Hayes bent over in the bucket seat and leaned with his elbows on his knees. What a horror. After insisting for more than a year he had finally taken her out and then this happened. It felt as if the universe wanted to punish her for even peeking inside her icy walls.

Every time he heard footsteps, he looked up, hopefully. An hour passed without anyone informing him about her condition. All this time he stared forward, reliving the moment the lightning struck her.

When Hayes started to feel they had simply forgotten him, a nurse finally came out and told him that Aella was stable, but she was still unconscious. She said that the patient's family was informed, although Hayes couldn't take comfort in it. He didn't know them anyway.

"You want to see her?"

Hayes nodded, although he did not know if he really wanted to. Still he walked with the nurse.

A lump appeared in his throat when he saw her laying in that hospital bed. Her eyes were closed, her face looked peaceful.

God, she looks dead.

"Is she in a coma?" he asked. His voice trembled.

The nurse nodded pitifully.


	5. The Breath of Death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

The world around her was pitch black. It was difficult to breath, she inhaled thick smoke. It burned her throat, scorched her nostrils.

She leaned over, sweating. Her stomach cramped, pushing up bile. She retched. A thick sludge came out of her mouth. No, it crawled out of her mouth. She touched her lips. Hundreds of insects crawled on her fingers.

She screamed, although her shriek only sounded in her head. She dropped on her knees and fell on something soft. A disgusting stink reached her nose. Suddenly all shadows left, revealing a mass grave. She laid amidst rotting corpses. In shock she came upright. Two empty eyes stared upward, they were part of the body she had fallen upon. A whimper left her quivering lips. Where was she? What had happened?

A gruff cry. A crow skimmed over her and landed atop the body of a young girl. Her dead body moved slightly when the bird tore off a piece of her cheek.

Aella's whole body was shaking. Sobbing she rubbed her upper arms. Her fingers slipped over her skin. When she looked at them, she realized they were covered in blood.

Horrified, she stepped back. With a watery sound, something fell on the ground.

Guts. Her guts.

There was a large, bloody hole in her belly.

She fell on her knees, her fingers glided over her stomach, trying to push back her organs.

A bright light blinded her. A voice whispered sentences full of hissing sounds, which she couldn't understand.

Then her sight returned.

She was in a hospital. Her mother stood beside her. She cracked her eyes and someone yelled.

"Doctor! Doctor! She's awake!"

Running footsteps, three doctors entered her room. Behind them, in the doorway, stood Hayes.

She frowned. _What is he doing here? What am I doing here?_

"What happened?" she asked, dully.

Her mother laid a hand on her shoulder and squeezed. "You were struck by lightning. You have been in a coma for a few hours."

She stared at her mother in disbelief. "W-what?" She couldn't remember anything about it. She had... been eating with Hayes and he had convinced her to take a walk. She looked at the doorway again, where he was still standing. It looked like he was struck by lightning. He showed her a smile, but his eyes made clear he didn't know whether he should stay or go.

Aella closed her eyes. She thought about the dream. This one had been much worse than the others. She touched her stomach, there was no bandage. It had felt so real...

She looked at her mother. "Am I... Am I wounded?"

A doctor answered: "We have discovered no injuries. Are you in pain?"

Aella shook her head.

After half an hour the dregs of her nightmare had slipped out of her head. She felt fine. She had no pain, her memories had all returned. The doctor saw no reason to keep her in bed and described her condition as stellar.

"Are you coming to my house?" her mother asked after she had put on her jacket.

Aella shook her head. "No, I'm okay. Thank you for coming."

She didn't know if she was _really_ grateful. The relationship with her mother had always been difficult. It had been one of the reasons she had moved to the city. She wanted to stand on her own two feet as soon as possible.

"I think Hayes wouldn't mind taking me home."

The man looked up when he heard his name. "Of course not."

She noticed he tried to pretend to be nonchalant, but his eyes revealed that he was glad that she didn't ignore him. She wondered what he was thinking. She bet his memories of the lightning strike were far more vivid than her own.

"My car is still at the restaurant."

Unwillingly she looked at her mother. Now she had to ask her a favor anyhow. "Could you give us a ride?"

"Of course, my dear, of course."


	6. Awkward Silences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Aella barely felt relieved when her mother drove away. She walked to Hayes' car. What did she have to say? She couldn't just blow him off, as she might have normally. What had happened to them, had they created a bond she couldn't ignore?

"How do you feel?", Hayes asked after theya were both in the car. He didn't start the engine yet.

"I'm fine.", she answered honestly, even though it sounded hollow. "And you?"

He stared through the windshield. Aella watched his face. He was a sweet guy. She even regretted her lack of feelings, even a little. Not feelings one should hope for after a first date, at least.

"It was... so bizarre."

Aella sighed. Her fellow students already believed she was strange, who knows what they would think if they heard this. Which was unavoidable, such an event would undoubtedly be in the papers tomorrow.

"Did you think I would die?", she asked. She had the feeling he didn't want to say the words himself, since they sounded so dramatic, but she couldn't imagine that thought had not crossed his mind.

"I did. I froze. I didn't know what to do when..."

Aella bit her lip. She almost wanted to apologize, although she had not asked for a lightning strike.

There was a silence. She saw a shimmer in Hayes' eyes. Her own eyes felt as if they were burning too. She breathed in, nervously. She wished he started the car and drive away from this horrible evening, but no matter how fast he drove, nothing could take these memories away.

"Thank you for staying with me." Her voice was only a whisper. In a flash she remembered the terrifying things she had seen when she was unconscious. A tear glided down her cheek. What she had seen and felt in that twilight world felt more real than the accident. She sighed, her lips trembled.

Hayes turned his head and looked at her. He moved his hand, as if he wanted to wipe away the tear.

"In a movie this must be the moment the couple kiss," she noticed, hoping a little sobriety would help them.

He lifted the corner of his mouth. "I'd like to stick to that script."

She chuckled softly. For a moment she was tempted to do so, however she realized that would only created a tenser atmosphere. Something like that shouldn't be a result of some weird sense of guilt. "And yet I think it's better if we don't."

His grin did not fade away, but his eyes showed her rejection did hurt him.

Finally, he started the car.

On the ride home they did not talk to each other. Thankfully, it didn't take long. She felt relieved when the street she lived on came into sight. Half a minute later he stopped in front of her apartment building.

"Well... it was a bizarre night," Hayes said. "But I liked having dinner with you."

Aella nodded, not knowing what to say or do. This was the reason she had avoided dating. All those uncomfortable moments... She didn't need thunder strikes to experience them.

"I, uh, I hope you sleep well," she said awkwardly.

"You too." His glance wandered about her face. "If you... want to talk about something, or if there's something going on... then call me, all right?"

"Yeah..." Aella opened the car door, wondering if she had to say something like that in return. "Well um... sweet dreams." She stepped out of the vehicle before she could say more stupid things and rushed into the lobby.

Oddly enough she felt no relief. Loneliness surrounded her like a sudden cold mist.


	7. A Dying Child

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Aella sat on her bed, her legs crossed. It was 4:15 AM. She was wide awake, which was odd after quite a day. Was the adrenaline still rushing through her veins?

Luckily it was Sunday, she didn't need to go anywhere today. If she felt tired, she could go to bed.

Hours passed and even the boredom did not exhaust her. She had placed her laptop on her lap and watched a few episodes of The Crown, and although she normally couldn't keep her eyes open after three episodes, today was an exception.

The sun had already set. Outside she heard cars drive through puddles. The streets weren't very crowded this early in the morning.

Aella closed her laptop. The series no longer kept her attention. She stood up and stretched her body. She still felt good, which was unimaginable after sitting crossed-legged for half of the night – let alone a few hours after she was hit by lightning.

She walked to the coffeemaker, more out of habit than that she really felt a need. While the machine started to drip she turned to the window. She leaned on the windowsill and stared through the glass. The sky was blue, there were no traces of the clouds that had caused the moist soil.

Suddenly the hairs on her arms all stood up, as if the window was slightly cracked open. Her stomach shrunk, she felt restless.

A shiver crept down her spine when she heard a whispering voice. It was fragile, desperate, which was rather intuitive knowledge than that she could really hear it.

Aella tilted her head a little, hoping the sound would become more audible. Was there somebody in trouble? She held her breath when her breathing disturbed the silence.

There it was again, very softly.

"Help me..."

For a moment it felt as if ice cold fingers stroke her hand. Quickly, she pulled back her arm. Was there a ghost in her room? She had never believed in the paranormal, but what else could explain that voice and touch?

"Help me, please..." Soft as a breeze the voice glided by. In a flash Aella imagined a girl, ten years old at most. She looked at Aella with wide, desperate eyes.

Aella's hand was shaking. What was happening to her? Had the lightning caused neurological damage after all? She thought of all the nightmares that had tortured her the past year. There must be more going on.

"Help me... I'm afraid to die." A sob. Aella had the feeling her heart was withering. Was somebody dying at this moment? A child? Had she developed a sixth sense because of the accident?

She thought about the superheroes all the papers were constantly talking about. Special gifts were not uncommon at all, although a healthy skepticism had always convinced her the majority had just been a publicity stunt of Stark Industries.

And that freak that came swinging with his scepter? The aliens? Sokovia? Could someone really set those things up to place himself and his friends in the spotlight? Aella didn't know what to believe anymore, but it was naive to assume that she was imagining the voice.

She put on her shoes and her jacket, grabbed her keys and went outside.

For a long time, she wandered through the streets. She tried to focus on the voice, but the passing cars distracted her.

Concentrate, Aella! She didn't want to think about the chance that she really heard someone's death whispers, and that she wasn't to able to help the victim because she just couldn't concentrate.

"I'm coming," she whispered. "I'm coming for you. Do you hear me?"

Silence.


	8. Their Pain, Their Fear, Their Despair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

There were blisters on her feet. It was getting dark soon. How long did she walk around here? The hours had passed by in a haze. She hadn't found the girl. Other voices had joined the cries of the girl, a chilling lamentation whimpered in the back of her head continuously. 

Aella turned back home, cold. She had a thumping headache and felt sad. Where were those voices coming from? She longed for silence. Would she ever find it?

At home she lowered herself on the couch. She put up the headphones of her cell phone, turned on the music and stared at the ceiling. 

Four ongoing days Aella spent hanging on the couch. She was desperate. The voices were driving her insane, and she could only escape them by listening music. As soon as she did, a maddening guilt bothered her. She felt their pain, their fear, their despair. Shutting them out was barbarous. 

Aella heard her cell phone buzzing, but she couldn't encourage herself to pick it up. It must be Hayes. He had sent her a couple of messages. She hadn't know what to answer – she still didn't. The day after the thunderstruck she had received a lot of messages, but Hayes was the only one who did not give in. She showed a sad smile. 

Should she tell him about the voices? He had been with her, that night. But how could he help her? He would claim her brain was damaged, which Aella could not disprove. She however felt something else was going on. 

She closed her eyes. She got sick of the music, but she didn't dare to turn it off. How badly did she want to sleep, to find some rest... but she hadn't slept a second since that horrible night. How long was she awake? More than hundred hours. And even though her head was bursting, she didn't feel tired. It was strange. So strange. She really needed to talk with someone. She groped for the cold metal of her phone and looked at the screen. It had indeed been Hayes.   
  
 –  _Could you please answer? I'm worried. X_  
  
The text oppressed her, but she got over it. Wasn't that what she was longing for, secretly? For somebody who thought about her, who wanted to listen to her? She disgusted her weakness. Her whole life she had taken care of herself. Why did she now feel such a need for help?

_Because you were hit by lightning. Because you hear voices. Because you haven't slept for four fucking nights._

"Fair enough," she sighed and she started to typ. 

– _Could you come by?_

She had barely pressed the send button when she received a message, as if his eyes were tethered to his phone.   
  
  –   _Of course. I'm on my way._

Aella sighed. Didn't she take advantage of his feelings  when she burdened him with her problems? On the other hand... she had made very clear she wasn't interested in a romance. She needed a friend and at this moment – sadly – a boy she had once dated came closest. 

* * *

Because she couldn't receive Hayes with a headphone on her head, she turned on the music on the laptop. The sound wasn't concentrated enough, the murmurs forced themselves upon her immediately. 

"Please. Come for us," the broken voice of a woman whispered. "You could save us. Only you can save us." 

A whimper. A screech that made her cringe. 

Pain shot through her head, tears welled up in her eyes. She clenched her teeth. 

It worsened. She didn't know how long she could endure this. The voices became more compelling, were screaming louder. Aella got the feeling their owners were on a rack and that it wouldn't take long before she would no longer find herself in this room, but in a dim dungeon filled with terrifying instruments of torture. 


	9. Mental Health

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Aella pressed her knees against her hands. The skin around her eyes tensed. Right before Hayes had rang the bell, she had been blindsided by a hysteric cry she couldn't completely cover-up. Her eyes were still red and there were traces of tears on her cheeks. She didn't dare to look at Hayes. 

He sat in front of her, but she could feel his despair. It hit her like a hailstorm, ruthless, cold and painful.  

She breathed, shakily. She wished he said something. Not that she had any right to do so: he had asked her what was going on and how she was feeling for three times now. Her lips felt frozen. And still she blamed him for being satisfied with her silence. Then, out of the blue, one of the voices started screaming. So shrill, so raw that she cowered. She grabbed her head and started to cry again. What next? Would they lock her up in a mental institution?

Far away she heard Hayes calling her name. Repeatedly, more intrusive. Aella tried to pull his voice back to her, but the screaming went on, turning into sobbing. 

In the end it became quiet.

Dead quiet.

Aella couldn't remember that she had closed her eyes, nor that she had fallen on the ground. It felt as a black out. 

Hayes sat beside her, on his knees. In his hands he held a cellphone. 

"Have you... called the ambulance?" she asked with a shaking voice. 

He looked at her with a pale face. His eyes darted in all directions. 

Aella bit her lip.  _Why am I doing this? Why am I dragging him into this shit?_

"It was so... terrifying... I thought you were having a seizure. What happened?"

Aella got her knees up, laid her head against. She had to tell him. "Since the lightning strike... I hear voices. They scream, beg for my help. As if... As if they are dying."

Silence. Carefully she peeked over her knees. Well... how did you react on such a message? If he had told this to her, she had sniffed dismissively, telling him that he probably should leave the drugs alone.

"Did you went to a doctor?" he asked eventually. 

She shook her head. "I don't dare. I'm afraid they believe I'm crazy."

Hayes laid his hand upon hers and tried to catch her glance. She looked at the ground on purpose. "What... what do you believe?"

"I don't know. Everything is different since that day."

Countless thoughts raged through her head. She thought about the recurring dreams, which she had had  _before_ the lightning strike. It felt as if the dying people she had seen had received a voice now. 

"Come. I want to show you something." She stood up and walked to her sleeping room. There she handed the notebook in which she had written down her dreams. "The last weeks I had very realistic dreams. I... I want you to read them."

Hayes took the small book and sat down on the edge of the bed. The frown on his forehead could mean a lot of things. Did he think it was strange she entrusted him something so personal? Did the fact that she had crazy dreams confirm his suspicions that she was insane?

She barely dared to breath while she awaited his verdict. Sweat drops itched in her neck. He turned a page. Said no word, hardly moved. She bit her fingernail. 

After an endless time he looked up. The expression on his face was one of anxiety.

_O God, he really doubts my mental health._

"D-do you think I'm crazy?" Her voice trembled. She felt weaker than she had ever felt.

"Maybe that had been better." He closed the notebook without making a sound. "But what's more worrying... is that you write about Loki."


	10. The Teasing of a God

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

"Loki?" Aella repeated. There had indeed been one name she had written down. She hadn't registered before, it had been a detail that had felt just as natural as the rest. 

She hadn't analysed the dream thoroughly, hadn't searched for a meaning. Not until now, now she saw a connection with the whispers in her head. Way back then she had only wanted to write it down to drive off the oppressive feeling, the  _real_ feeling, the dreams caused. 

Hayes gave her a questioning look. "Are you suggesting that you don't know who Loki is?"

Aella shrugged. It was a name. There must be plenty of people who had that name? Or cats – it sounded like a cat name as well.

"Loki is a Norse god."

"Oh." Aella never had had an interest in history and mythology. And Norway was such a cold country, even colder than England, where she lived. "Oh wait... Wasn't there another Norse god, a while ago? Such a friend of Tony Stark? With a hammer?"

It had been a few years ago. One of her high school friends couldn't stop talking about him.   
"Indeed! Loki's brother, adopted brother. Even though in some mythologies he is the blood brother of Odin. It's complicated."

Aella pulled a face. She couldn't create an image of Thor's brother in her mind. "And he came to this world as well?"

"Geez, have you been living under a rock?" Hayes frowned, she got the impression he finally  _really_ doubted her mental state. "He almost destroyed humanity! Wait, I'll show you a picture. Maybe that does ring a bell."

A few seconds later he shove his cellphone towards her. On the screen was an image of a man in a gold and green robe. On his head he wore a golden helmet with two large, backwards bending horns. 

 _Well have I ever! This afternoon I was just thinking about this lunatic!_ So that was Loki. She couldn't see much of his face, which made it impossible to identify him as the man from her dreams. "Oh, he... And you think I dreamed about him?"

Hayes took back the cell phone. "Loki is the god of deceit and chaos. He betrayed you in your dream. And he is a  _god._ An insane god. I can imagine he believe it's fun to hit you with lightning, send you scary dreams and whisper things in your head."

Aella stared at him. Was a god doing this to her? "But  _why?_ "

"I don't think he needs a reason. Maybe he's bored."

Aella looked around. Could gods make themselves invisible? Was he watching her the whole time? How could she make sure that he would leave her alone? "How –  how do you know all this?"

Hayes shrugged. He didn't look at her, as if he felt ashamed for his knowledge. "Don't we all want to be a hero? Captain America, Iron Man, Black Widow, the Hulk... I would give up my bank account to belong to them. Not that there's much on it, but..." His cheeks turned red. 

 _How adorable. He wants to be a superhero._ She could swallow her cynical remark just in time. She didn't want to scare him away. There was finally a theory for everything that was going on   – another theory than that she was insane. She sighed and rubbed her temples. What now? How could you get in touch with a god? Did she have to pray? That guy had wanted to destroy the world. He wouldn't stop teasing her like that. 

"Do you really think Loki is doing this to me? Since I've remembered his name? For if that is really true..." She sighed again. "Then I might be better off in a mental institution. There they can sedate me. But if this is really the work of a god, even that won't help me."


	11. A Stolen Kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki's POV

Loki leaned back in his chair, with his feet on the table. He threw up a rubber ball and caught it. He didn't even know where it was coming from. Probably from that dump where they had been a while ago. Sakaar. Or whatever it was called. It hadn't been a bad place to stay, the few days he had spent there. Unattached, anonymous. But he was way too ambitious to rule a pile of garbage. On what he  _would_ set his sights on, he did not know. Perhaps Alfheim. It must have been hundred years ago since he had been there. Maybe the elf race had already been extinct. Caused by boredom, probably. 

A risk he was taking as well. He yawned. 

How long would it take before they would land somewhere? He wanted fresh air. This star ship made him claustrophobic, although his boring fellow travelers could be the cause as well. Now and then he tend to take over the wheel, but that wouldn't get him anywhere. Navigating through the universe wasn't one of his talents. Neither was waiting. 

He stood up, rolled his shoulders, cracked his neck and walked out of the room he had taken. Time to pay his brother a visit. Usually it was easy to put the squeeze on him. Probably the best entertainment he could find here. 

A glass wall shove aside when he came close and he entered the next room. It was a fifteen-minute walk to the control room of the ship, that was surrounded by transparent windows. He flopped on the empty chair next to Thor. "And? Where are we going? You've figured that out now?"

Thor turned his head aside. "To Midgard."

"Oh, fantastic." Loki sighed. "Earth. Yeah, there they are really fond of us."

"They are fond of me..."

Loki rolled his eyes. "You think they are going to make room for the Asgardian population? They are already suffocating each other. Why don't we go to Alfheim?"

"Brunnhilde wants us to go to Midgard."

"Brunnhilde. Of course. Why making a choice yourself." He sniffled. "Have you learned nothing from that fling with that mortal? You can't live without female attention."

Thor showed a stupid grin. "I can't help it that you scare away all female company. Well, actually  _all_ company."

Loki pulled up the corner of his mouth. "Women are ballast. There's nothing in the world that is a man's greater weakness."

Thor chuckled. "How would you know?"

 _I know more than you think, brother._ Even nowadays he thought about her, sometimes. He stared forward, to the million stars. For a moment he felt a pressure in his head, and an annoying contraction of his midriff. 

Quickly he pushed away the tickling memory, before it would fully reveil itself.   
It had been one stolen kiss. 

 _Just one._ And deadly as snake-potion. He could still feel the paralyzing effect on random moments. The longing to see her once more, to touch her once more. 

It withered his soul. 

_If I have one, at least. But hey, it sounds poetic._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In Ragnarok they already decided to go to Earth, but since that does not fit my plot, you have to ignore that sentence. (:


	12. Fathers and Mothers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Aella blew in a mug with tea. Actually she didn't like tea at all, she only drunk it when she felt sick. Or when she was confused, as she was now. Hayes sat in front of her, his hands were wrapped around a mug as well.

Still she wasn't entirely convinced that it was a god who did those things to her. Why would he? There were billions of people, why would he trouble her? She had never did anything to him.

She said the thought out loud.

Hayes sipped from his tea and looked at her. "Maybe it isn't about something you have done, but your parents? Do they have something with Scandinavia?"

"My mother not," Aella answered. "I have never met my father."

"Is he still alive?" Hayes asked, hesitating.

"I wouldn't know. My mother refuses to tell anything about him. I think I am the product of an one night stand."

 _Or of a rape._ Her mother always got gloomy when Aella tried to get answers, so that she had given up quickly.

"I think it is a good idea to retrieve some information about him. It could be a lead. In fact, I don't know where else to start.

Aella took a sip of the tea. The taste of strawberries rolled through her mouth.

A lonely period laid behind her. Of all things a  _lightning stroke_ had arranged that she felt comfortable around someone again. There were moments she wondered why Hayes was doing this, why he did not shrink of all the bizarre things that surrounded her. For a moment she had been afraid he wanted something from her, but now he had admitted he wanted to be a superhero, she understood that this situation intrigued him and that he really wanted to help her.

"Okay," she agreed. "Let's go to my mother."

She wanted to keep moving, search for answers, for solutions. Only then there was a soft murmuring in her head, instead of awful screaming.

* * *

An hour before dinnertime they sat on her mother's couch. Her mother had hugged her, and thereafter the questions started. How she felt, if there was anything wrong with her. Aella had formulated her answers as evasive as possible, without giving her mother the feeling she was withholding information.

"Mom..." she started after a while. "I know you don't like this subject. But... I need to know something about my father. The doctor... for some additional tests the doctor needs to know if there are genetic matters he should take into account."

She searched for Hayes' eyes. He nodded almost imperceptible. She needed it, lying to her mother wasn't something she was familiair with. Lying wasn't one of her talents anyway, she forgot too easily the lies she had told.

"And eh... I also need to know if there important things on your side of the family."

Mother sighed deeply. She stared at the shiny laminate, on which fell a pool of sunlight. "I should have told you this before." She stroke her hair, that was slightly going grey.

Her fingers trembled a little. "If your health is really at risk..." She shook her head.

Aella sat up straight. Her mother never was distracted, she was always very alert. What was going on?

"I don't know who your father is, my love." She laid a hand on Aella's. "And actually, I don't even know who your mother is."

Aella widened her eyes. "W-what?"

Her mother squeezed her hand. Hard, as if the truth hurt her. "You were abandoned. As... as a baby."


	13. A Terrorizing Universe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Aella stared at her mother. " _What?_ And you didn't find that important enough to tell me?"

Her mother dropped her eyes. "I was afraid you would feel unwanted."

She jumped up, even though she didn't know what she wanted to do. Smashing something to pieces, that would help. She clenched her fists, but she restrained.

"I am sorry, dear." Tears shimmered in the brown eyes of her mother.

Aella breathed heavily. She looked at Hayes, cursing him for keeping his distance. Of course, it made sense, but she longed for someone who saved her from this situation. And wasn't that what he wanted to be? A superhero?

"Well, this isn't helping us any further." She marched out of the room. She didn't want to be around that woman any longer, who had pretended to be her mother her whole life.

"Aella! Please wait!"

With a bang Aella closed the door behind her. The stained glass that was in it, trembled. She rubbed her face. This was just what she needed. A god in her head and dumped on the street by her parents. Was their a link? Had that god taken the shape of a human and raped a woman? Was that how she had came into this world? She squeezed her fingers. Her fingernails cut into her skin. A wintry frost blew down her face. Great. The whole universe was terrorizing her these days. Why wouldn't it.

Impatiently she turned to the door. What took Hayes so long? She was able to just walk away, but she wouldn't know whereto.

She rubbed her upper arms while she walked the sidewalk. In the distance she heard a rumbling.

No, in her  _head_ their was a rumbling.

 _"Please. Help us. Help us, please."_ Two pleading eyes looked at her. The face was covered in blood. On her elbows a young woman crept closer. Aella's stomach turned when she realized the woman had no legs. From the waist down there was only a bloody mess out of which stuck bones, as if something enormous had bitten her in twice.

 _"You could save us. You could save us all."_  Something gigantic, massive as a mountain, fell out of the sky and crushed the woman.

Aella's body convulsed. It took her a lot of effort to shake off the image. Panting she bent over. The blood-stained mud puddle turned into grey paving stones. She was back.

"Aella? Are you all right?"

Aella sighed without turning around. "Yeah... the voices returned. This time fitted with images, like a fucking tv-show."

Hayes laid a hand on her shoulder. "Have you tried to talk to them? If you also see images? They ask for help, don't they?"

"They usually die soon," Aella mumbled.  _And usually I'm too shocked to say anything._ "But what would they have to say? This is just the prank of a stupid god, am I right?"

"I don't know. I just spoke with your mother... she has searched for your parents, but never found a trace of them."

With hanging shoulders she turned to the boy. "What now?"

There was a compassionate look in his eyes. "I don't know, Aella. I'm sorry. If there is really someone waiting for you, maybe in another world, then I think they are the only ones who can help you. Maybe you have to try to stay a little longer in those... visions."

Aella clutched her teeth. She was constantly bouncing between two theories: that a god was playing with her mind and that there was really someone waiting for her help.

Two extremes.

She sighed. "I don't have a choice."


	14. Where worlds collide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Tears ran down her cheeks. She was surrounded by severed limbs, beheaded bodies and mass amounts of blood. Some bodies were still moving, they stared at her with hollow eyes and their trembling lips uttered barely audible whispers.

Aella knew all of this wasn't real: all she saw were memories of a nightmare. Although it was  _more._ This nightmare unfolded itself, but it was still all in her head. Nevertheless the silent, salty drops glided down her cheeks. There were no words to describe the suffering she was facing. Only tears. Whoever had caused this, had no soul, no heart...

Something cold spun around her wrist. She turned head aside. There stood a young woman. Jet black hair was curling over her shoulders, leaving behind a dark red trail. There was a deep crack in her forehead, as if somebody had jammed an axe into it.

"Rota," she whispered. "You've come. You can save us."

Aella stared at the creature. She had white wings. Despite the places where feathers had been ripped out, they reminded her of an angel.

She resisted the urge to tore herself away. "Where do I go? I don't know where to find you."

"Go to the place where worlds collide. You will know, when you look deep inside yourself."

Suddenly the woman froze. The point of a sword went through her eye and she fell down.

Nowhere was an enemy to be seen, he must be invisible.

"Eir!"

Aella had no idea where that knowledge came from, but somehow she knew the name of the young woman. She fell on her knees beside the body. Before she could touch her friend, the ice broke beneath her and she fell into an ice cold, black void.

* * *

"Aella?"

Hayes' voice was getting to her slowly. She looked up. She sat on the ground, her arms clamped around her knees. Her eyes felt swollen, she must've cried.

"What happened?" she whispered.

"I... I don't know." Hayes crouched down in front of her. "You were deep, I think. For a moment I was afraid that you... that you were stuck in your imagination – or whatever it truly is."

Aella loosened her stiff fingers. There was a sharp pain behind her temples and a pounding headache set in from the back of her head. She felt exhausted. Her thoughts wandered to the young woman. Eir. That had been her name. Had she known the girl? It felt like it. But how was that possible? She rubbed her blond hair. All this still made no sense.

"Take it easy. You're back now." Hayes took her hands. "Have you learned anything?"

"Rota..." she whispered. "She called me Rota. And her name was Eir." She took a deep breath. "I... I have the feeling I bear someone else's memories. It all feels so... real. Or maybe... Maybe my soul was transferred to another body, in another dimension... Man, that's just crazy."

Hayes bit his lip, pensively. "Could it be possible that your mind is somehow entwined with someone else's? On another planet – where there's definitely a war going on? Because of the lightning strike, you know?"

Aella shrugged. That could be. In theory,  _everything_ could be.

"And you haven't found a lead? A place where we can find more answers?"

"At the place where worlds collide," Aella sighed. "She said I should know when I looked deep inside myself." She shook her head. Riddles, it were all riddles.

"Hmm." Hayes rubbed his shaved chin. "Where worlds collide... I can't help thinking about Loki again. Where did he come to Earth? At least somewhere in the USA."

"Or we need to go to Norway. Where the Norse mythology is coming from."

A warm feeling shot through her shoulder, as if someone placed a hand upon it. In an impulse she looked over her shoulder. There was no one.

_"Follow your heart. Follow us."_

"Norway," she repeated. "I think they want me to go there."


	15. Land of Ice and Snow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

A week later they sat in an airplane. Aella had put up her headphones so that her music drowned out the whispers. Hayes sat a few rows up, there hadn't been two seats next to each other available.

Aella didn't know what to think of Hayes' decision to book a flight to Norway too. She had the feeling she was building up a debt she could never pay off. But the boy had smelled adventure and she couldn't change his mind.

Of course she was glad about it. In all honesty she didn't know how to do this without him. The past days she'd passed out a few times, slipping into another reality, so that she barely dared to go anywhere. Not without Hayes. It was bizarre how quickly you could become close with someone. Although it was at most two weeks ago that they'd dated, she couldn't imagine her current situation without him.

Aella closed her eyes. She longed for sleep. Since the accident sleeping was still in the past. Her body had just decided it no longer needed sleep, though her thoughts disagreed strongly. She really wished she could escape from the images and the voices. She wasn't getting used to their constant presence at all.

Two days ago Aella had encountered another side effect: she'd bumped into a pile of food cans in the supermarket, and she'd caught nine of them. None of them had touched the ground – and Aella hadn't even tried her best to catch them. When she'd shared her findings with Hayes, he'd thrown things at her head for the rest of the evening. Only one time she'd been too late.

Still her infallible reflexes weren't outweighed by the war in her head. That needed to end, as soon as possible. How she had to accomplish that she didn't know, but she had a little faith. The first step was taken.

* * *

Aella looked over the snow-covered plain. They were now in Norway for three days. Twice a day she'd fled to the horrible world of shadows, hoping to find any clues. And now they were here. In the middle of an ice cold plain, with a taxi-driver who refused to go further. Aella didn't know if it was wise to move on. What if they got lost? They would freeze to death in no time!

_At least Hayes will. You have no idea to what things you're immune those days._

"What now?" she sighed.

Hayes showed her an optimistic smile. "You still hear the voices? They're becoming louder?"

Reluctantly she hung her headphone around her neck and allowed the voices. Screams, shrieks, pleas. No clear words. Did she have to visualize the images again? She was barely recovered from the last time.

"Let's go to that hill overthere. Maybe we'll see something." She nodded to the right.

Hayes didn't object. Deep inside, Aella did.  _What the hell are you hoping to find here? A frozen mammoth?_ They could better dive into a library. There they were at least save from freezing. She bet the Norse mythology could teach them more than this pile of snow.

Hayes however had already started to move and Aella followed him. She tried to give in as often as possible, having the feeling she was at least giving him something in return.

The climb was slippery and steep, but Aella was facing no difficulties. Hayes however slipped three times, but all these times he clung to her very not-so-heroic, and prevented himself from falling. She was even starting to believe he was being careless on purpose.

She put her hands in her sides when she'd reached the top and looked around.

"Holy shit," Hayes stammered next to her.

Frowning she looked to the right.

And then she saw it.

Roughly five hundred meters to the right there was a spaceship in the snowy valley.


	16. First Impressions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Aella couldn't believe her eyes. Although she'd only seen spaceships on TV, she was sure this was one. It was enormous, had round forms and existed largely of steel. The nose of the colossus was made of glass, just like a cockpit. Well – it  _looked like_ glass. That would be a little too breakable in space.

Her fingers tingled of excitement. A real spaceship. She started to laugh. Not so long ago she'd been convinced aliens didn't exist.

"What do we do?" Hayes' voice sounded a bit higher than she was used to. "We're just going to take a look? It could be filled with monsters."

Aella grinned. "Where did your heroism go ?"

He started to blush. Quickly he moved down the hill, as if he desperately wanted to restore his honor.

Aella followed him closely. The voices had brought her here, she was sure of it. She wasn't crazy. All this happened for a reason. Hopefully they could help her to get rid of them.

Her enthusiasm faded away before she reached the foot of the snowy hill. That was incredibly naive. Of course the voices wouldn't just get quiet. Perhaps that spaceship would bring her to that other dimension and would she die there, just like all the others.

She straightened her back. She had no choice. The voices and images had only worsened her condition the past days. She couldn't ignore them. If she did nothing, she would meet her end as well.

Aella and Hayes were only a few meters separated from the space ship when the doors opened all of a sudden. Three people stepped out of it. A woman and two men. Her stomach cramped up when her eye caught one of the men. It was him. It was Loki. She'd dreamed about him. Now that she could see his blue eyes and medium black hair, she was 100% sure.

"It's you!" she stammered. "You're in my head!"

"I beg your pardon? I am in your head?" His cynical glance took her in from top to toe. "Believe me girl, I'd rather go into another part of your body," he grinned.

Before his words could fully land, she slapped his cheek. Loki's head snapped aside and her hand hit the spaceship. Deep cracks shot through the steel. Steel that should withstand raging comets. She felt no pain at all.

Rubbing his cheek he looked at her with renewed interest. "Hmm..."

"I've dreamed about you!" It felt so real that this man had  _betrayed_ her that she still felt the pain in her chest, as had happened during the dream. She totally lost control.

Loki chuckled and turned his head to his friend. "You hear that, brother? A pretty mortal that is dreaming about  _me._ That must be hard for you."

"Aella... calm down." Hayes grabbed her hand and pulled her back.

Aella felt her whole body shake.  _This ain't good. Those weren't my memories, but someone else's!_ For a moment it had felt as if someone else had taken control of her body. Then the panic crashed in.  _Oh shit, I hit a god! The're two fucking gods in front of me!_

She had trouble breathing. God, the air was bad here. Vaguely she noticed that Hayes was rubbing her back, trying to calm her down. As soon as he would stop with it, she would most certainly started to hyperventilate.


	17. A Difficult Conversation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hayes' POV

Since the first Avenger had appeared on the TV screen, Hayes had closely monitored the news. Meeting one of them had been an illusive dream. And now he walked through an abandoned spaceship, together with Thor, a lady who clearly wasn't from Earth and – unfortunately – also Loki. 

Although it hadn't taken long before he had had a bad feeling that Loki had something to do with Aella's condition, it was hard to realize that they had found him so quickly. And even more bizarre: Loki created the impression he had no idea what was going on. Of course it was unwise to believe a single word the Asgardian was saying, but still... He'd had hoped his lies were easier to read. 

Thor brought them to a large room that looked like a conference room. Only when Hayes stood in the square room, he noticed the glass was tinted. He could see out, but that hadn't been possible when they'd been in the hallway. 

Hayes made sure he sat next to Aella. Since they'd entered the ship, she hadn't said a word and that worried him. He saw Loki's eyes were constantly drawn to her. He had to be curious. Hayes suppressed the urge to pull her close.  Not that there was a slight possibility he could really protect her from Loki – which she could perfectly do herself by the way – but he still felt the need to do so. 

While the others took a seat around the table as well, Hayes felt his phone burn in his pocket. If he could only take a selfie... with this three people and  _in_ a spaceship. He would be crazy if he didn't do it. 

Or... actually it would be pretty stupid. He would lure the authorities right to them. It wasn't without a reason that this spaceship had landed in the middle of nowhere. 

A little uncomfortable he looked around the table. Nobody seemed to know how to handle the situation. He decided to take the floor, despite Aella's rejection on amorous level he still wanted to proof himself. Especially among two gods. 

"What are you doing here? On Earth?"

He glanced at Loki. If one found him here, he would probably end up at an electric chair. Although he doubted whether that would work. Could a god be killed?

"What are  _we_ doing here?" Loki shot back. " _You_  were at the door of our ship." He turned his eyes to Aella. "And beat down the host."

"Brunnhilde wanted to be here," Thor said, ignoring his brother. He nodded to the woman who hadn't introduced herself yet. She had a tanned skin, dark brown hair and white stripes on both sides of her forehead and beneath her right eye. She wore an armor that made him think of that of a gladiator. 

Brunnhilde looked at Aella. Hayes got the impression she felt a little disappointed. 

"Why did you want to be here?" Hayes asked when she didn't explain herself.

"I don't know," she said snippy. 

"Were there voices who told you to go here?" Hayes insisted. Was that the connection between the two women? Had they called at each other? 

She rose her eyebrows. "Voices? Nah, just an instinct that led me to this place."

Loki chuckled. "Just like a beast."

Everyone ignored him. 

Hayes looked at Thor while trying to connect the dots. There must be a reason for all this, something that connected all of them. "And you?" He aimed his question at the god of thunder. "Any chance you accidentally hit Aella with your lightning?"

Hayes felt his cheeks turn red. It sounded as if he doubted Thor could control his own powers. 


	18. Silent Admirers

Her eyes were itching. She wanted to leave this place. Getting here had been a mistake. Loki's presence squeezed her throat. A part of her wanted to fly at him, strangle him, and another part just wanted to run like the devil. Both emotions came from deep within her and she didn't understand them. She remembered flashes. A razor sharp pain. Cynical laughter. A tear. A kiss. She didn't know if these were remnants of a dream or if she was intercepting the thoughts from someone else. But the images were torturing her more than the voices had ever done. She was aspirated from reality, the people around became only shadows. 

Someone was petting her hair. Aella opened her eyes. She was in a rectangular dim room. Was she back in her dorm room? Had everything just been a bizarre dream? Relief surged through her when she saw Hayes. The only constant factor in the past days, it seemed. Dazed she looked around. This wasn't her own room, even though she was lying on a bed. The room looked sterile. "Am I back in the hospital?"

Hayes pulled back his hand. "We're in a spaceship. In Norway? Don't you remember?"

She sighed. Yeah, she remembered. Unfortunately. She'd hoped all that had just been a bad dream. "Have I– have I slept?" she asked, surprised. "Finally, after all those nights?"

"Not from the outside," Hayes answered carefully. "You were fully self-absorbed. I couldn't get through to you, nobody could. You saw a vision? You were back at the battlefield?"

Aella shook her head, even though she didn't know where she  _had_ been. It felt as if she'd floated through timeless space. It had been cold and warm. There had been joy and fear. Love and hate. She raked a hand through her hair, frustrated. She'd passed the point that she thought she was crazy a long time ago. 

"I dunno. I don't have the impression things are going better since I'm here. You're closer to solving this?"

Hayes bent his head. She knew what that meant. "Thor claims he'd nothing to do with the lightning strike. He doesn't even have Mjölnir anymore."

"Who?"

"His hammer."

"Ah." Somehow Aella had the feeling that should bother her, but she couldn't bring herself to worry about a hammer. 

"Maybe you should go talk to Brunnhilde. She wanted to go to Earth, something pulled her hereto. Maybe it's you. Two women looking for something... without knowing  _where_ they are looking for... There must be a connection."

Aella closed her eyes. All she could think of, was Loki. "Was he mad?"

"Who?"

She sighed and opened her eyes again. Skittishly she looked aside. "Loki. I hit him hard, didn't I?" She touched her knuckles automatically, but her skin was undamaged and her bones didn't hurt. 

"Yeah, you did."

There was no twinkle in his eyes and he didn't chuckle, as she'd expected. "You think he wants to take revenge?"

"He isn't very vengefully, I think." He twisted the ring around his thumb. "I rather get the impression you're fascinating him."

For a moment her field of vision seemed to vibrate. Then he suddenly stood in the middle of the room. With a little squeak Aella recoiled. 

"You are absolutely right, kid." He showed a wide grin. 

Her heart squeezed. Breathing was suddenly very difficult. Where was that insane fear coming from? He wasn't very tall, nor very muscular. His stature was far from impressive. And she'd beaten him without difficulty. 

It wasn't his appearance that cramped up her muscles, and she couldn't wrap her head around what  _did_ trigger such a reaction. In normal circumstances she could have appreciated the fact that he was making a mockery of everything, and there was no unbounded aggression in his eyes. 

 _But he is insane, Aella. He tried to destroy your homeworld. Why are you even looking for a_ reason _?_

With his head tilted a bit Loki studied her face. "You're afraid of me, aren't you?" He chuckled. "Finally, a mortal with some sense."

"Leave her alone!" Hayes jumped up, so that he stood between them. 

"Ah come on kid, don't overreact. I'm just a silent admirer."

"I've seen quieter admirers," Aella grumbled. 

He smirked. "Ah, she rediscovered how her tongue works. Good, let's talk then ." He waved at the door. "You can wait outside, boy. Overprotecting boyfriends are a pain in the ass."


	19. Role-playing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

"Forget it. I'm not leaving her alone with you, freak." Hayes squared his shoulders and looked at Loki with a determined look in his eyes. 

Aella bit back a smile. He was brave. It was hard to assess how Loki would react if he wouldn't get what he wanted, but it was probably in a violent way. 

"I'll be fine," she tried to convince Hayes, even though the prospect of staying together with Loki in one room turned her intestines into something liquid. 

"You'll be fine?" he repeated, his voice a bit sharp. "You should've seen yourself at the table, a while back! You looked like a freaking retard, I'm surprised you weren't drooling!"

Aella stared at him. Suddenly his presence started to suffocate her. She knew she owed him a lot, but he didn't have the right to make her decisions for her.

The most frustrating of all however was Loki's smirk. Of course he was enjoying this. 

"Hayes, please," she sighed. She made a weary hand gesture to Loki. "He will not leave before he gets his way. I'm too tired for this."

Anger clouded Hayes' face and the boy turned around and slammed the door behind him. 

"Well well, I'm not used to so much drama..." Loki folded his hands behind his back and took a step forward. 

"Stay put. That's close enough."

Loki took a flippant bow. "Whatever you wish, majesty." Miraculously he indeed kept at his spot. His eyes found hers and kept her attention. Aella shivered when a shred of her dream slid through her mind. She felt how Loki brushed her cheek, how he kissed her forehead. She could feel his lips burn against her scalp. 

"What are you doing here?" she asked, shaking off the image. 

"Thy declaration you were dreaming about me aroused my curiosity, oh majesty."

"Stop calling me majesty."

Again that sneering grin. Oh, how badly she wanted to beat it off his face! 

"Just enjoy my sham humility. I have the feeling you're the type of woman who likes such role-playing."

Her jaw dropped down in indignation. 

"Was that what you were dreaming of?" he asked without giving her the chance to reply. "Was that the reason you hit me so hard? It surely felt as if you'd practiced."

Aella felt her cheeks glow. She hated this. She hated him. She realized she'd clenched her hands into fists again. Everything about him filled her with anger and powerlessness. That twinkle in his eyes, that groovy attitude, that sneering voice... and then that stupid, stupid smirk! 

"Is this such a moment you freak out again? Like you did at the table?"

She breathed heavily. "If I bang your head through that glass wall, it isn't my fault."

"So much aggression... And for what? Can you really blame me for being curious about your dream about me? Or dreams, right?"

Aella considered which answer was the easiest way to chase him away. She almost wanted to say he'd killed her, just because that would surprise no one, but she changed her mind. She didn't want him to think it was some kind of a vision, giving him the idea to really kill her. But what could she say? She wasn't going to tell him there had been something between them that even transcended friendship. Then he would come up with even more of these stupid remarks. 

"You destroyed everything I loved," she said eventually. She squeezed her eyes. "And you almost really did so, a few years ago! I'm not the only one who has nightmares about you."

Loki looked right into her eyes. She wondered what the hell was going on in his head. 

"Satisfied now?" she sniffed when he kept silent. His penetrating glance made her break into cold sweat. 

"Oh, I'm far from being satisfied. I have many more questions. For example, where is that superpower of yours coming from? And... why do you refuse to tell me what your dream really was about?"


	20. Spinning Thoughts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Aella looked at the hallway. Hayes had pressed his nose against the glass wall, even though she doubted he could hear or see anything. She turned to Loki again. She felt wrung out, exhausted, and the fear that she _still_ couldn't fall asleep threatened to crush her. She'd hoped to find answers here, but all she got were more questions.

Her arms hung down defeated. Tears were pushing each other away in her eyes. Disappointment grabbed her throat. This man would never help her, she didn't even needed to know him to know compassion wasn't streaming through his veins.

"Can you leave me alone? Please?" She stared at the ground. Her consciousness started to slip away again. Back to that horrible place, to the domain of Death. Her fingers clamped around the edge of the bed.

At least five minutes passed by, in which she stared at the white floor. Slowly she saw blood seeping into her field of vision. It gathered in pools in which she saw the reflection of her own battered face. She shook her head. This wasn't real, this was just a macabre game her mind was playing with her.

While she was shaking her head, she lifted her head a little. That was when she saw him.

Motionless, still in the middle of the room. She'd assumed he'd left quietly, but he hadn't.

For a moment his eyes widened when their eyes met. Was he spooked? His mocking smirk had disappeared and she thought to see a flash of pain on his face. Before she could convince herself of it, his appearance faltered as if she was looking at a malfunctioning television.

Then he was gone.

A little lost Aella kept sitting on the bed, not knowing what to think of this. Now she was alone again, the heartbreaking laments started again. Aella let herself get sucked away. After all the intense things that had happened today, this felt the most familiar.

* * *

Aella was cold to the bone when she woke up. She was lying on the ground. Her joints were burning and she discovered her head was bleeding. This started to look like epileptic seizures more and more. Was that what was really happening? Was she sick after all?

"That didn't look very nice."

In a wild movement Aella turned her head aside. Loki sat sideways on her bed, with his back against the wall.

"You just watched me while I was..." She was so stunned by disbelief she couldn't find the right words.

Loki shrugged his shoulders. "I wanted to see what would happen."

"You really are a dickhead," she grumbled.

He pulled up the corner of his mouth, but the glance in his eyes was hard as stone. "So you're twisted in the head. I'm not surprised. Is that the reason you came to us? You hoped that we could help you with our godlike powers?"

"I never expected you would help me, not for a second."

"And still I'm the one who's here. The only one."

Aella grimaced. That was a painful truth. She sighed and looked the other way. Looking at him made her restless. "A few weeks ago I was hit by lightning. Since then I haven't slept, I have perfect reflexes and apparently I can punch dents in a space ship." She sighed. "From the beginning I heard voices of dying people, nowadays I see them too and apparently I'm also blessed with seizures."

Finally she looked at him again. The fascination in his eyes made her feel sick. She wished it was Hayes who was sitting there, who would have laid a comforting hand on her shoulder. But Loki gave her the impression this was something she should be _happy_ about.

"And what are you doing here?" he asked.

"The voices told me to go here."

The glance in his eyes changed, as if he no longer thought she was crazy. He stared at her, pensively. His thoughts were running, she was sure of it.

_What the hell is going on in his head?_


	21. Honesty is the Best Policy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki's POV

Loki was a bit overwhelmed by the memories she shook up. The way in which her face expressed her emotions felt so familiar his stomach twisted. 

He felt how her glance probed his face. Hungry for answers, for solutions. Something inside him wanted to help her. That part of him he wanted to push away as far as possible. He owed her nothing. 

He could better leave, before someone realized she confused him. At the same time he felt a longing to stay close to her, as if she was a fire whose warmth he needed. He couldn't describe what he was feeling, and he didn't even  _want to._ He thought about the woman his brother had been willing to die for. 

And he thought about Rota. 

Had he done all he could? He'd honored her last wish, he had let her die in peace. A favor he had never done to anyone. 

For a moment Aella held his glance. There was something sweet about her, but also something inexorable. And she was beautiful. 

 _And insane,_ he mocked to himself. 

He chuckled internally. There was nothing wrong with being insane. Even though Rota hadn't been insane. She'd been restrained and wise and fearless. 

He shook off the image of the Valkyrie. It was Brunnhilde's fault she'd slipped back into his memory, causing some feelings of regret and loss. 

"What in the world are you thinking about?" Aella looked at him with frowned eyebrows.

"What you would look like without clothes." He smirked provokingly. It was a natural response, trying to shock her so that she would shut up. 

"I don't buy it." Her glance slipped downwards, to his crotch. "Something would have gone up there."

He laughed, surprised, and sat up a little straighter. For a moment a smile adorned her face. 

She stood up and rubbed her neck, which she'd probably injured during her seizure. She looked hesitantly at the bed. Something encouraged her to sit down next to him, her legs crossed. "I don't believe it is a coincidence that you are here while the voices led me to this place."

Loki turned a little more towards her. There was a fresh scent around her. The hours she'd slogged through nature must have expelled the stench of the city. 

"Brunnhilde wanted to go here. That I'm here, is a coincidence."

"Then why wasn't I dreaming about her?"

Loki shrugged. "If you really think I could help, you should tell me about that dream, don't you think?"

She dropped her eyes. "I'm on a battlefield, mostly wounded, with dead people all around me. You're not always there. But if you do..." Her fingers brushed the duvet. "Then I'm dying. My arm is cut off. In the guise of a young woman you try to let me blow into a golden object and when I refuse..." She looked up at him. 

"Then I take you to the green hills of Idavoll," he added, frowning. "You loved that place."

She stared at him with wide eyes. All colour was drained from her face. Loki suspected his face was just as pale. Dozens of thoughts were racing through his head. How was it possible she dreamed about that fateful day? The day he'd driven from his memory since? 

"W-what is this?" Her lips were trembling. "Do you have those nightmares too?"

"No," he answered. "If only they had been nightmares..."


	22. The Dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Aella studied his face. It looked paler than a few minutes ago and his breathing showed he was a little tensed. For a moment it felt like she was talking to a normal human being. Because of his smooth skin that even lacked any traces of stubble, he didn't look much older than she was. It confused her, she reminded herself he was a sociopath with supernatural powers. A murderer. And a liar. 

Despite all those convictions she felt he was speaking the truth now. He'd exposed a side of him not many people had seen. He looked uncertain. Of course that could be an act, but all the strange things she'd been through had taught her to trust her intuition. She  _knew_ he'd committed innumerable crimes, and still she had the feeling he was sincere now.  

She considered her next words. Should she dig deeper? Or should she share her own thoughts, hoping it would encourage him to do the same? She had the feeling he could go back into his shell any moment, being the clown he was. 

"I thought my mind might be connected to that of someone else," she started, hesitating. She tried to read the look in his eyes, but noticed it made her nervous. "Thus that I was seeing what that other woman is going through. Maybe... maybe that lightning stroke was some kind of distress call from her. Somehow I had the feeling those voices were calling me so that I could help her."

"She is dead."

His insensitive words made her cringe. Still she looked up to him. Loki was staring at the wall in front of them. "So... all these things really happened? What I see in my dreams?"

He didn't answer. Aella didn't know how to interpret the expression on his face. Somehow he looked sad, but maybe she was just imagining things. After all it should be normal someone was emotional on a moment like this. It was rather a feeling she got than that his face was really showing emotions. She folded her hands, before she would take his in a comforting gesture. 

"Were you with her when she died?"

Loki leaned back and rested with his head against the wall. His black hair contrasted with the white wall. "No. I thought she rather wanted to die alone."

"Who was she?"

Loki turned his head aside and gave her a pensive look. She could easily fill in his thoughts: will I leave or will I answer? She could't figure out why, but he did the last. "Rota was a Valkyrie. You know what those are?"

"Not really," she admitted a little ashamed. Sure, she had heard about these mythical creatures, but she knew no details.

"In the eyes of men they were warrior goddesses. They took the fallen heroes from the battlefield and brought them to the halls of Walhalla. During Ragnarok, these heroes, the  _Einherjar,_ should have taken a stand against Surt when he destroyed our worlds." 

"Did that already happen?" Loki looked quite stoic for someone whose homeland was destroyed. 

"It took place in different episodes. The Valkyries fought their battle years ago, together with many of the Einherjar. They failed. The next episode has just ended. Hella and Surt destroyed Asgard together. That's why we're in this spaceship. We're looking for a new home."

Aella thought about all the fallen warriors she'd seen. "I remember a dragon."

"Nidhogg. Surt persuaded him to join his side."

Aella suppressed a sigh. She didn't understand much of it and her role in all this was the most incomprehensible of all. "I don't know why all this is happening to me."

Loki remained silent. She felt he had some suspicions, but he didn't want to share them. She was afraid he would leave when she persisted, and she needed more answers first. 

"By the way, what were you doing on that battlefield, Loki?" she asked carefully. Her heart was hammering in her chest. It was a bold question, she might ask too much from him. 

Loki however shrugged his shoulders. "Well... as usual I was trying to get a good thing out of it. And like most times, that didn't go as planned." He rubbed his neck. "Maybe you shouldn't ask further. I'd rather not see you make a second attempt to split my head."


	23. Conflicting Souls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Aella stood her ground. If she wanted to know what those voices wanted from her, she needed to know  _everything._ "During those dreams – or visions – I'm closely linked to that woman, to Rota. I feel her pain, her fear..." She searched for his blue eyes. "And I feel her hatred. You betrayed me – her."

If there was even a shred of remorse, he didn't show it. He didn't look away, she even got the impression he kept staring at her intentionally. 

"She hated you," she emphasized, persistent. She wanted to break him, she wanted him to burst into tears so that he would admit his sins sobbing. Of course that didn't happen. The only visible traces of sadness were the tears she'd seen in her dream, and she didn't even know if they had been  _real._

"I think Rota always hated me," he answered, shrugging his shoulders. "Maybe even more than all other Valkyries."

His answer confused her. It wasn't true, otherwise his betrayal wouldn't have hurt so much. She however doubted it was a wise thing to say. It felt like Rota had wanted to keep her feelings secret and even though Aella didn't know who she was and what their connection was, she wanted to protect her.

A part of her wanted to find out what feelings he'd had for her. On the same time that prospect was smothering her and she didn't see how that would be helpful. "That golden object... what is it?"

Loki tore his glance away and stared at the wall. Almost a minute passed by. Aella felt his inner conflict. Still something encouraged him to answer. "A soul catcher."

Aella felt her chest tense up. What did that mean? "You wanted me to blow into it."

He turned his head towards her again. He studied her face. Aella shivered. It felt like he was looking for something, but she had know idea for what. 

"I wanted to keep you with me. A part of you." His fingers played with the edge of the blanket. "I loved you."

Something bubbled up inside of her. A laugh. "Your lies are so transparent."

His eyes found hers again. His glance was intense, maybe even hopeful. It felt like he was trying to look into her soul and she felt a knot in her stomach. 

"Tell me the truth," she persisted when things became so uncomfortable she felt sweat drops itching her neck.

A quick smile flashed over his face. "Always so decisive..."

Aella fiddled with her finger nails. Sometimes he spoke to her as if  _she_ was Rota. And, she realized in shock, there were moments she did the same. 

Was it possible Rota was  _inside her_? Pushed away to a corner of her mind? A shiver crept down her spine. Was she awakened by the lightning stroke? Was she claiming more and more of her mind? Until there was no Aella left? What should she do? Push her back? Free her? And thereby taking the risk she would be overpowered? 

"I... I need to talk with Hayes," she stammered. 

Again that mysterieus glance. Did he try to read her thoughts? Were they both conspiring against her? What happened when she had a seizure? Was Rota trying to take over control? Panic suddenly squeezed her throat. 

"Go away!" 

When he didn't react, she grabbed him by the collar and smashed him to the other side of the room. With a bang he hit the wall. 

"Go away!"

She heard how he spoke to her, how he tried to soothe her, but she didn't want to hear his lies and she started to scream so loud that Thor, Brunnhilde and Hayes  _had to_ hear her.

 


	24. Accusations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki's POV

With a bang the door was slammed open. Thor, Brunnhilde and Hayes rushed into the room. The last one ran to Aella immediately, who looked at him with so much fear and hatred it wasn't leaving Loki indifferent. It wasn't particularly the first time someone was looking at him that way, but he was just overwhelmed this time. The last thing he'd said to her, was that she was decisive when she easily detected his lie. It had been a compliment. Sort of. As a reaction she'd swung him through the room and screamed as if he'd been trying to rape her.

Loki rubbed his right shoulder blade – or at least tried to get there – which had caught the biggest smack. She really was unbelievably strong.

"What have you done this time?" Thor's hand clenched around his arm like a vise. "Why do you always have to cause trouble!"

Thor dragged him out of the room. Even without a hammer he was stronger than Loki was. Neither did he have the energy to resist, his thoughts were still with everything that had been said and Aella's sudden change.

"I didn't do a thing," Loki did object verbally.

Thor sniffed. "That would be a first." He threw open a door and pushed Loki inside. "Stay here. If I find out you teleport yourself elsewhere, or even create an illusion you're still here, I'll chain you so that you can't use your magical powers."

Loki rolled his eyes. "You better chain that girl. She's insane." With his finger he tapped his forehead, Thor wasn't very perceptive.

"She didn't attack you for no reason."

"Eh... yes, she did."

Thor squeezed his eyes suspiciously and slammed the door. With a sigh Loki paced through his room. He rolled his shoulders, as usually the pain was already fading.

He flopped on a chair and thought about all the things she'd said. He had a suspicion where those voices she heard were coming from. That could play out both good and dramatic for him, and judging to the way she'd swung him to the wall tend to the last. It however was still an opportunity... an opportunity that occurred right at the perfect moment.

* * *

 Loki was still sitting on the chair, thinking about the way he could use Aella. Now and then his thoughts slid to Rota. Had she given her powers and memories to a mortal, right before she died? It looked like it. A nagging feeling told him there might be more left of her, but he kept in mind that could just be what he  _wanted._

Rota had been smart. He didn't doubt she'd known about his plans, and she would have tried to stop him if she could. But how? She'd been barely alive when he'd left her. And why would she use a  _human_? The most insignificant of all creatures?

He looked up when the door opened. Thor and Brunnhilde both stood in the doorway.

"She doesn't say a word. What did you tell her?" the Valkyrie asked.

The corner of his mouth curled up. "If she hasn't told you anything, that might have a reason, don't you think? She might have tried to knock me out for the second time, but at least she told me what was going on."

Thor took a step forward, trying to look threatening. "You forced her."

Loki chuckled. "How? I got many powers, but none of them seems to affect Aella."

The glance in Thor's eyes softened a little. "A human you call by her name..."

"A human?" Loki repeated. "She is no human." His eyes rested on Brunnhilde for a moment.  _She's a Valkyrie._ He'd wanted to say the words out loud, but decided to keep the information to himself a little longer. If only to annoy the others.

"Then what is she?" Brunnhilde asked.

"Find out for yourselves. But be warned: she easily gets enough of you."

He smirked when the Valkyrie studied his face.  _It's quite remarkable I recognize your sister before you do, sweetheart._


	25. Possession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hayes' POV

Aella was sitting on the bed, her back against the wall and her arms wrapped around her knees. She stared forward. Hayes didn't know how to get through to her. It was hard to judge if she was pulled into that dreamworld again or that she was just self-absorbed. 

When Thor had broken down the door, he'd ran inside after the god. Aella had been in a frightful state, screaming and sobbing, and Loki had looked more shocked than amused. Although Hayes didn't trust the man and was convinced it was better for everyone if he would be cut out of their lives soon, he'd doubted Loki had been willing to harm her at that very moment. Thor however had drawn his conclusions immediately, and dragged his brother out of the room. 

Hayes shook off his thoughts when she spread her fingers over his hand. They were ice cold. 

"I'm afraid, Hayes." Her voice sounded hoarse, the look in her eyes was feral, glistening by the tears that had gathered. 

He turned around his hand so he could hold hers and squeezed. "Afraid of Loki?"

"Afraid of myself. Of what's... in me."

Even though questions were burning on his lips, he kept silent to give her the chance to continue. 

"Loki knew how my dream ended."

"Did he sent you that dream?"

Aella shook her head. "He seemed just as stunned as I was when I told him about it. The things I've dreamed... He went through it all."

"He's a good actor..."

"I know. Still I don't believe he's the one behind it." She bent her head. "The woman that I am in my dreams... and now in my visions... her name is Rota. Loki told me she's a Valkyrie who died during an episode of Ragnarok." With her free hand she raked through her blonde hair. "I think I've received her memories, her power..." Uncertainty filled her eyes when she looked up to him. "Maybe even more. Maybe... maybe she's  _inside_ me."

"You mean... you're possessed by her?"

"Would that be crazy?"

Hayes shrugged his shoulders. At the moment he was in a spaceship in Norway, together with three gods – or whatever Brunnhilde was. Crazy thoughts existed no more. 

"I think Loki really cared about her. About Rota. If she's really trapped inside me, I fear he wants to help her taking control over me."

Hayes thought about her words. This was way over his head. He'd never been very spiritual and he had no clue how to help Aella if what she said was true. 

"But why would the spirit of a Valkyrie try to possess you? Is she seeking revenge at Loki? Why would she have chosen a body that was, eh, so far away from him?"

Aella shrugged. "In her eyes humans must be weak."

"And why would Loki wanna help somebody who wants to take revenge at him?"

She stayed quiet for a while. "Out of guilt?"

"Guilt?" Hayes repeated skeptically. "We have many reasons to fear Loki, but I don't think  _guilt_ is one of them. That man has no conscience."

"How would you know? You barely talked with him."

Hayes let go of her hand in shock. "He created a portal by which thousands of murderous aliens came to our world! He's responsible for the death of dozens of our species! And I don't think he felt remorse for a single second!"

Aella bit her lip. "I know, I really do. In his eyes we're nothing but vermin ready to exterminate. But Rota wasn't. I read regret in his eyes."

"Or maybe the Rota inside you just  _wants_ to see that," Hayes answered agitated. He took a deep breath to calm down. "Sorry." He looked at her for a long time. "I've been around you all the time, those last days. Not one moment I thought you were possessed."

"She's probably smart enough not to express herself."

He heard her swallow. She really was afraid. It made him angry Loki encouraged her to believe this nonsense. "If Loki knew Rota, Thor must have known her too. Let's talk to him. His words are far more reliable than those of that deceitful god either way."

Aella showed a barely visible nod. She didn't seemed to be convinced at all. 

"Why do you doubt?"

She dropped her eyes. "Because I'm afraid he rather has Rota on board as well."


	26. Thor's Wisdom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Aella wrapped her arms around her torso. She felt fragile – more fragile than when Loki had been around. From the black haired god she'd assumed the worst, and she'd always taken his words with a grain of salt. She'd never expected help from him, and now she was putting all her hope in the god of thunder. 

The three of them were sitting around the table. Hayes had told Brunnhilde that Aella wanted to talk with everyone in private, and the woman had been content with that explanation. Since Aella didn't know what her role in all of this was, she doubted she would really do so, but that was something she'd decide later.

First Thor.

The man sat in front of her. With his elbows he was leaning on the table, and he leaned a bit forward. "I want to apologize for my brother," he said. "Whatever he's done." 

His voice was deep, with a raspy edge. It was a refreshing change after Loki's facetiousness and her nervous heart calmed down a little. 

"You don't have to. He behaved, to his standards." Her voice sounded weak and she bit her lip. It felt like all the sleepless nights were finally taking their toll. However, deep inside Aella feared this had nothing to do with physical rest. Maybe it was Rota who was eating away her awareness. Her hands started to shake. She saw how Thor's lips moved, but his words didn't land. 

Desperately she looked at Hayes, who laid his fingers upon hers so that they were no longer trembling. He gave her an encouraging nod. 

Aella took a deep breath. Was she really going to do this? Or was she just about to sign her own dead warrant? She straightened her shoulders. If she did nothing, she neither would bear this much longer.

"I told Loki about the images I see. Because he also has a role in them." 

Even though she wasn't  talking about  _her own_  memories she still felt her cheeks glow. Carefully she looked at the man in front of her. Contrary to the other god, he was all seriousness. A frown was drawn on his forehead.

After a squeeze in her hand from Hayes, she continued: "He told me I have visions of events that have really happened. About an episode of the Ragnarok, when the Valkyries and the Ein- _something_ perished. The fallen heroes. Against a dragon." She squeezed her eyes for a moment. This must sound really incoherent. She searched for words. For some reason she didn't want to mention the connection between Loki and Rota – whatever that had meant. "The images I see are memories of Rota. The Valkyrie. At least, that's what we're thinking."

Thor's eyes widened. 

"My strength is coming from her as well. My quick reflexes. The fact that I don't sleep anymore..." She bit her lip. "And the voices of the dead." She tried to concentrate. She didn't knew how to formulate the rest of her thoughts. Hopefully she looked at Hayes.

"She's afraid she's possessed by the spirit of Rota," her friend blurred out. "And that she's trying to take over."

A few seconds passed by. All Thor was doing, was staring at them. A few more minutes and his lower jaw would drop down. 

"Is something like that even possible?" Aella asked softly. "You're a god. You should know these things."

Thor pulled down the corners of his lips and shook his head. "Not that I know of. Moreover, according to your time course it's been at least ten years since the Valkyries died."

Aella sighed. Strangely enough she didn't feel relieved at all. "Then how do you think I got these powers?"

Thor shrugged his shoulders. "Some humans just get super powers. I know some other guys..."

"And dreams?"

"Perhaps they're just dreams, fantasies." He shrugged again. "I would not attach much value to the words of my brother. It's just in his nature to make fun of people and to get under their skin."

"But I dreamed about him. And Rota. How can I dream about Rota if I never knew she existed?"

"Hmm." There didn't came out much more. "Maybe that's too convenient indeed."

Aella looked at him, awaiting. There was no evidence he really expected Rota to be inside of her, he didn't even seem to care about her. 

"Why don't you talk with Brunnhilde? Rota was her sister. And she was the one who wanted to go to Earth."

"Brunnhilde... is Rota's sister?" she asked overwhelmed. She got a knot in her stomach. This couldn't be a coincidence. Her thoughts shot to Loki. Why on earth had he kept such a detail to himself? 


	27. Resistance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

"I don't know if I dare to tell her." Aella massaged her temples. She had a migraine-like headache. "She will be even more keen to see Rota back than Loki."

"She'll find out sooner or later anyway," Hayes answered soothing. "And Thor is a good guy. He'll make sure nothing happens to you."

Brunnhilde entered the room and took place on the chair where Thor had been sitting. Thor himself stood next to the door as if he was a guard. The only other person on the ship was Loki and she couldn't think of a good reason why they would shun him. He knew more details than any of them. 

Aella directed her glance forward and started to tell. Now she'd told her story to the two men, it was easier this time and all of it sounded more logical. 

Brunnhilde's eyes widened more and more by every line she said. A little more and her eyes would bounce on the table. 

Suddenly her face grew grim. She shoved back her chair and drew her sword. Aella stared at it in disbelief. She hadn't even noticed the woman wore one. Hayes jumped up and took a protective stand in front of her, but the Valkyrie walked past them and ignored Thor's indignant exclamations.   
  
A few seconds went by. Aella's heart went back to a more regular pace.  _What just happened?_

Brunnhilde's sudden anger wasn't addressed to her. 

"Loki." Aella turned around and ran to the hallway. She didn't even know what was motivating her; concern for Loki (which was hard to believe) or curiosity to their fight. 

A few steps away from her, a door was shut. Aella opened it again and came into an empty room.

Wildly Brunnhilde looked around. "Where are you!"

There was a mocking laughter that seemed to come from everywhere. "Move away that sting-thingy first. I've been confronted with more than enough female hormones for one day."

Brunnhilde exhaled so angrily that Aella thought to feel the air tremble. Still she put the weapon away. 

Loki appeared right next to Aella. His arm touched hers and in a reflex she stepped aside. 

The door went open. Hayes and Thor entered the room as well. 

"Well well, how cozy." 

"Aella told me about her visions," Brunnhilde answered abruptly. 

"Bizarre, isn't it?"

The Valkyrie clenched her fists. All Loki did, was smirk. 

"You were there when my sisters died! That can't be a coincidence!" Before Aella could blink an eye, the Valkyrie had grabbed Loki by the collar. "Don't sass me."

"Calm down." Loki pushed her away. "All these groping hands today... Thor and that kid are almost exploding of jealousy." He gave Hayes a wink. 

"Don't change the subject. You are going to tell us exactly what happened that day."

The traits of Loki's face hardened. "That question must occupy your mind for quite some time, huh? All your sisters were killed instantly. But where were you? I might have left an unforgettable impression on this beautiful lady, but you were strangely absent." 

Brunnhilde clenched her teeth together and gave him a challenging look. "The Alvader gave me another task."

"What a privilege. And what was that task?"

She didn't answer.

Loki turned to Aella, the same stupid grin on his face. "See, I'm not the only one who's keeping secrets. It looks like you have to extract a piece of the puzzle from all of us before you can see the bigger picture."

Wronged Aella crossed her arms. "You are a bunch of little kids!" She looked a bit accusingly at Brunnhilde. She hadn't even told her the whole story, she hadn't even mentioned Rota's name. "I need to know what those voices want from me. If that takes much longer, I guarantee you I will lose my mind and bring all of you down. Thus if you don't want me to turn this stupid ship into a junk yard, you better do whatever I say!" 

Loki whistled softly, his blue eyes sparkling. "It's like you never left, Rota."

 


	28. The Soul Catcher

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki's POV

Loki grinned when her eyes grew wide and her face got pale. "Calm down... I'm just joking. It just comes naturally to me. I accidentally caught some words when you talked to the others."

"Accidentally?" Thor's voice barked through the small room. It was remarkable his brother hold back, except when Loki was the one talking. He was getting a little tired of it. 

"Fine, not entirely accidentally." He rolled his eyes. "The others can't get you any answers, as you probably have noticed. But I can."

Brunnhilde crossed her arms. "Tell us."

"I won't say a single word to Aella until we're alone. You're accusing stares and relentless interruptions are quite disturbing."

The kid opened his mouth, but Loki silenced him with a wave of his hand. "You need to toddle off as well. My health is more at stake than hers." He smirked. "And when you intervene, you'll be the first passing out anyway."

Everybody looked awaiting at Aella, who sighed. He read the insecurity in her eyes. He could probably make her believe anything he wanted. 

"Fine. Leave us. I'll inform you later."

"I'm not leaving you with that psycho again," Hayes hissed, clearly convinced Loki's hearing was just as weak as that of a human. 

"Up to now he has been the only one providing answers, Hayes."

"Answers that might be just fiction!"

"I have got my eye on you," Thor's voice sounded right next to him. 

Loki turned away from the couple. "I bet your limited brain has trouble processing it, but I am not very fond of Midgard and I would like to leave this place as soon as possible. Before S.H.I.E.L.D. or whatever dumb group are at our doors."

Thor grumbled something inaudible and gestured Brunnhilde to follow him. The Valkyrie cast him a dark glare and walked away. Hayes was the last one who left the room. 

Loki stepped back and leaned against the wall. "Well... where were we? I know I'm sexy as hell, but if you want to touch me again please use your lips."

She stared at him without moving. Smiling was still impossible, but she neither gave him an angry look. Her arms hung down defeated. 

"What?" Loki asked. If she was going to play the poor victim, he would be done with this very quickly. 

"Rota..."

He couldn't help he got goosebumps when hearing her name. He folded his hands behind his back, trying to hide it as if he felt ashamed. 

"You really just wanted to stir things up? Or do you really see her in me?"

Loki looked pensively at her. She would be naive if she expected an honest answer and she'd seemed much wiser. "The only thing that reminds me of her, is the tension between us."  He held her glance and moved his eyebrows up and down. "You know,  _sexual tension._ "

She took two steps forward and stood still in front of him. Her face was only a few inches away from his. Loki looked at her, a little overwhelmed by her reaction. 

"I can't feel it," she whispered. Her warm breath caressed his cheek. 

Loki's glance wandered to her lips. "Well, I surely do..." It took him a lot of effort not the cup her cheek with his hand, but he wasn't about to deal with another smack in the face. She was way too unstable. 

She stepped back. Only now Loki noticed he'd held his breath. 

"I wasn't expecting anything more than a denial. But I know what I feel."

She rolled her eyes. Finally, she was getting her act together. "Maybe that day left you delusions too."

He chuckled. "I don't rule out anything."

Aella watched him for a while. Right when he wanted to ask her if she liked what she saw, she started to talk herself. "Tell me about the soul catcher. Is that where those voices are coming from?"

Loki felt a bit disappointed she'd drawn that conclusion herself. "I guess."

"Others have blown their souls into it before they died. And they want me to free them." Her eyes seemed to lit up a little, as if she was also surprised by the theory she was revealing. "Whose souls are in it? Those of everybody who'd died that day?"

Loki shook his head. "Those of your sisters. The other Valkyries. I think they're calling you."

Suddenly her eyes were beaming with enthusiasm. The sight of it made him smile, until he remembered where the soul catcher was right now. His smile froze. 

"And you have the soul catcher?"

"Not anymore."

"What do you mean?"

"You promised not to hit me, right?"

"Where are they?!" Her voice sounded shriek. 

For his own safety he teleported himself to the other side of the room. "I sold them. Traded them."

Her hands clenched into fists. "You did  _what_?!" 


	29. A Matter of Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Aella didn't understand why she was still surprised. Sure, she knew Loki for only a few hours, but that was long enough to see that he was always self-interested. 

"That better be an exchange for something really important," she grumbled.

"Absolutely. My life is very precious to me."

She suppressed a sigh. Her calmness surprised her. She'd already had the feeling the soul catcher wasn't close. "Then where is it?"

"In the hands of Surt. At least, it was, a while ago. But since whole Asgard is blown up with him on it, it's a little hard to assess what happened to him."

Aella raked her hands through her hair.  _Of course a little bit of luck was too much to ask._ She tried to piece all the things she'd discovered together. 

Rota was dead and right before she died, she'd sent her memories and powers by way of an SOS to a probably random human being. In those memories a soul catcher played an important role, in which her sisters – save for Brunnhilde –  had blown their souls. And out of that object, they were screaming at her. 

"What's in that soul catcher?"

Loki looked at her. His forehead showed a slight frown. "What do you mean?"

"What else is in it? My sisters are suffering, they experience an unbearable pain. That's why they're calling me, that's why they want to be freed." Her fingers clenched into a fist again. His eyes shot to them, and she saw he prepared himself to teleport away from her again. 

"I don't know. I only provided the Valkyries access."

"You provided access?" she snapped. "None of them knew what kind of object it was! If they'd seen through your disguise like I did, none of them would have done so!"

Loki shrugged. "I can't help they aren't as smart as..." He gave her a questioning stare. "... Rota."

Aella felt like she couldn't breath. It just happened again.  _Those are just memories from someone else, Aella,_ she told herself.  _YOU weren't there._

"Rota," she agreed softly, a little stunned. "As Rota." She took a deep breath, searching for the words she'd wanted to add. "Why did you lock them up?"

Loki rolled his eyes. "Do I really need to spell it out for you? The Valkyries were unparalleled warriors."

"Which worked perfectly out for your sick quest to conquer the world."

He smirked. "Exactly."

Her eyes probed his face. She wondered if there even existed words that could hurt him. 

"You feel it too, now?" His voice sounded soft, almost seductive. 

She frowned. "What am I supposed to feel?"

"That sexual tension between us?"

Aella rolled her eyes. His confidence was ten times worse than Hayes', and he had already gotten under her skin. "I try to figure out what you are withholding from me. I can't believe you just tell me what I want to hear."

"That's not really my style," he admitted. Again there was that annoying smirk on his face. "But you are interesting company. And if I want you to find me interesting enough not to hang out with the others, I have to tell you something useful."

"Then tell me how we're going to find the soul catcher. Otherwise, I have no reason to stay here."

Loki tilted his head a little. His blue eyes locked with hers. "You have to pay more attention to the voices. Follow their instructions."

"How? Since we're here, all they do is cry and scream." And even that had reduced. She even had the feeling she could block them now. 

"Not here. In your dreams, in your visions.  _That's_ the place you should look for answers."

Aella's throat felt dry. She really had to hang around there? On that battlefield, filled with horrors? "I... I can't," she stammered. "I will be killed."

"Take me with you."

For a moment she forgot to breath. She saw it in his eyes; he was serious. 

"You want me to take you  _inside my head_?"

There was no stupid grin, no wicked glance in his eyes. He was dead serious. 

But she wasn't falling for it. "Let me tell you something, Loki." She bowed a little forward to him and looked him right in the eye. "Of all people – and currently gods – you are absolutely the last one I will allow in my mind."

His masquerade vanished quickly. His glance became harsh, his grin scornfully. He wrapped a lock of her hair around his finger. "Then it has to be a very painful truth that I'm the only one who  _can_ go with you."


	30. His True Face

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Aella slapped his hand away from her face. She thought to hear bone snap, and a cloud passed across Loki's face. A muscle in his cheek vibrated while he shook his hand, grunting. 

Aella wondered if there was some kind of Loki defense system inside her. It was remarkable  she'd only hit Loki since she was so strong. Three times, by now. 

"Take it or leave it," he said. Something dark flickered in his eyes, as if his patience was running thin. "I don't offer my help to anyone."

"Bullshit. You'll be the one having benefit from traveling with my soul – or whatever is happening ."

"What benefit?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "You're to twisted to put myself in your shoes, but I know for sure something good will come out of it for you."

Loki gave her a piercing glare. Three deep wrinkles made his forehead look crumpled. "I'll wait. There will be a moment you can no longer bear their screams, and then you will get on your knees and beg for my help."

A cramping feeling arose in her chest. She felt an idiot for trying to find some sympathy, for putting hopes on a reasonable conversation. And it had been – until he showed his true face. 

"I will never kneel before you."

"Your pride isn't that great. Not when your sisters are screaming at the top of their longs while you are the only one who can ease their pain."

"Rota's sisters." 

He laughed mockingly. "Yeah, right."

In an instant he was gone. Aella stared at the place where he'd stood a second ago. Tears burnt in her eyes. She blinked them away and cursed them. She had answers, she should be happy about what she'd achieved. She knew who were whispering to her, and why. The only thing she still needed to figure out, was the location of the soul catcher. 

Maybe Loki was just fooling around, and wasn't he the only one who could enter her mind to help her with her visions. He was playing games constantly, he could have lied about this easily. 

* * *

Unfortunately Loki turned out to be right. She told the others what the black haired god had said to her. 

"I don't know if anyone will be able to go with you," Thor said. "But if someone is capable of doing so, it must be Loki. Hypnosis is one of his, eh, not so popular talents. With help of the Tesseract it was a piece of cake, but even without a tool he's skilled at it."

Hypnosis... the word alone gave her goosebumps, even without Loki's name connected to it. She looked at Brunnhilde, who'd said nothing. "What do you think I should do? They are your sisters..."

It was hard to read the woman. She acted indifferent, although she'd shown a fierce temper earlier today. She blew a bright yellow gom bubble. "That motherfucker locked up the Valkyries in an object. You really think he'll free them for the sake of your pretty face? They will shred him to pieces, and he sure as hell knows that."

"But what else would he want?"

"Screwing around? Looking for a new kind of entertainment? The space trip was boring as hell, and we won't stay here for long."

Aella suppressed a sigh. She really wanted to unravel Loki's motives, but that was just a hopeless task. "Will your sisters be able to hurt him when they're just souls?"

The Valkyrie shrugged her shoulders. "Who knows? I have never heard about that object before. Whatever Loki's masterplan might have been, I doubt anyone but he would have benefited from it." Her eyes flashed to Thor. "We should get rid of him. As soon as possible."

"I rather keep him close, so I can keep an eye on him," Thor answered.

"And then what?" Aella sniffed. "I get the impression Loki is a jack of much more trades than you. Especially since your hammer is shattered."

Thor's face grew gloomy. He grunted something inaudible. 

Aella returned to the room she'd usurped herself and sat down on the bed. She didn't feel safe at all. A while ago Loki had been here and he could come back any moment. She leaned back. Actually she was longing for a warm bath, perhaps that would calm her down. The facilities were surely available, but she didn't think she would ever dare to take off her clothes here. Not with a maniac that could appear right under her nose at any given moment, and who'd already made too much ambiguous comments.


	31. Trapped

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hayes' POV

For days Hayes had the feeling he was living in a dream from which he could wake up any moment. All of this was so bizarre. A date had led to his current whereabouts; in a spaceship in Norway. 

In a  _spaceship_ _._

Sometimes he wanted to laugh so hard it would make him deaf, and other times he felt a pressure on his chest, telling him he was involved in matters that were way over his head. 

He was painfully aware of the fact that he was the only one lacking superpowers. Actually, he couldn't do much to help Aella. He could listen to her and give her advise, but that's all. 

And if he was honest, he had no idea what to advise her. She would be crazy to allow Loki in her head, but what if that was the only way to move on? 

He stood in front of her door, hesitating to knock or not. Perhaps she just needed some space. She'd been busy all day. And maybe it was wise if he went to sleep as well, but he feared he wouldn't fall asleep anyway, there were far too much impressions to process. And knowing Aella had calmed down a bit, would surely help. 

"You're going to say your goodbyes?"

Hayes turned around in a rush. Loki stood only two meters away from him. Even though he looked physically relaxed, the tone of his voice sounded so threatening the little hairs in Hayes' nek stood upright. 

The muscles in Hayes' shoulders tensed. Unintentionally he puffed out his chest. He was just as tall as the god, and had a slightly broader built. "I'm going nowhere."

Loki shook his head, sighing. "Aella is a pretty toy. But you're not going to die for her, right? That's no good to anybody."

Hayes didn't know what to answer. "Your point?" He lifted his chin provokingly. 

"You think you'll survive in space? You're only a human. Not even an impressive one, by the way. A meaningless little boy."

Hayes clenched his fists. Since the very first moment that man behaved so condescending he wanted to beat the shit out of him. 

"Save your breath. The only reason I haven't defended myself against your girlfriend, is because she looks better without swollen eyes. You however..."

Suddenly the door swung open. "Knock it off." Aella put her hands in her sides. Hayes had forgotten she could see the corridor from her room. 

She looked at him. "I'm going to try to stay longer in those visions. You stay with me?"

Hayes nodded without thinking. 

She turned to Loki. "And you... Stay away from me."

The god smirked. "I'm afraid I have no influence on your visions. You'll see... what you wanna see."

Without saying a word she turned around. Hayes followed her inside in a hurry. When he sat down on the edge of the bed and looked at the hallway again, Loki was already gone. 

"You really think you can do this on your own?" Hayes asked softly. He was still afraid she would get lost in that world. 

"I have to try."

Hayes agreed in silence. They had no choice. Perhaps Loki could hypnotize them both so Hayes could join her, but he knew for sure the god wouldn't do them a favor like that. He didn't even bother to ask. 

"You've done this before," he encouraged her. He took her hand and squeezed. 

Nothing about this felt right, and her eyes showed that she felt the same. 

Still she closed her eyes and shrunk into herself. It didn't take long before she collapsed and he lowered her carefully on the bed. 

* * *

Hayes ran his fingers over her forehead. She was soaked with sweat. She was moaning and clenching her teeth. It took long. Too long. 

Now and then he felt goose bumps all over his body. It were moments like these he feared the most, afraid she slipped away in her mind. 

Only after a while he realized his goose bumps were caused by something else. There was someone in the room. And of course that could only be one person. 

"Loki?"

No answer.

Still he felt someone was watching him, in the corner on his right. 

"Are you keeping her from returning?" His voice cracked. Something was wrong, he could sense it. Should he call Thor?

Hayes recoiled when Loki stood next to him all of a sudden. He looked down on Aella. 

"She's trapped in her own imagination. I have to help her."

"No," Hayes protested fiercely. "She doesn't want that, you know that!"

Loki turned his face to Hayes. His blue eyes were inscrutable. "Otherwise she won't come back unharmed, kid."


	32. Wander

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki's POV

Blood splashed with every step she took. There was so much blood she needed to wade through it. With one arm she leaned on her knee, she'd lost the other. It was ripped off. Something that happened in many of her dreams. Even though she'd seen it coming, it was still shocking. And the pain didn't lose its intensity either.

She wiped the tears from her eyes. It became harder and harder to hold on to the knowledge that this wasn't  _really_ happening. Everything she experienced were memories of Rota. No more and no less. Deep down she however doubted that was true. In her first dreams Rota had died relatively quick, but this time she'd walked into another direction. Answers were only available at places she hadn't been before.

But there were no whispers to guide her. Only screams, sobbing and moans.

The words of dying people, volatile and rash.

She heaved a shaky sigh. She didn't know where to go, nor what to do. Had it been better to allow Loki to accompany her?

No, that would be insane. How many warnings did she need to remember that? Loki had betrayed her, here, on this battlefield. Rota had been convinced of that. Or had she been wrong?

The thought that Loki was somewhere in this place, gave her an uncomfortable feeling. Sure, it was another Loki than the one she'd talked with – the projection of a younger Loki – but it was him. And somewhere in the back of her head the fear whimpered that Loki  _had been_ in every dream, but denied it.

It shouldn't surprise her.

She shook off the thoughts. She had to focus. She looked from left to right. The plain extended endlessly. There were bodies as far as the eye could see. With a shock she realized she was the only one who was still standing. In the distance the monster roared.

He would come for her soon.

"Aella?" A soft voice suddenly sounded behind her.

She turned around immediately.

Hayes stared at her with enormous eyes. His shoulders tensed.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, so overwhelmed she forgot to breathe.

Hayes' eyes kept glued to her face. She didn't know how to read his glance, and a few seconds passed before she realized he wasn't looking at her, but at Rota's body.

"You're so alike." Hayes did a step forward. He seemed insecure.

"We do?" Aella had no idea what she looked like. This wasn't the kind of place you went looking for a puddle to watch your own reflection.

"Your hair is black and you have wings, but your eyes and your lips... And..."

"Once again, what are you doing here?" she cut him off. His words only made her feel uncomfortable.

"You're stuck in this place for far too long. I'm afraid you'll end up in a coma. Loki told me someone needed to help you."

"And he didn't go himself?" She looked skeptically at him.

"He was afraid you would push him out of your mind."

"Good point."

"Your arm..." he stammered all of a sudden.

"Yeah, I lost it." She looked around again. "I have no idea what I should do here, Hayes." And she honestly didn't know how  _he_ could help her. "There's nothing but corp-" She sharply turned around. "Damn it, Loki! You think I'm an idiot?"

"It was worth a shot." He changed into his own form. "You saw through me easily."

"Hayes would have been more shocked when facing such a slaughter for the first time."

"Ah." Loki smirked.

Aella clenched her fists. She could only think of one maniac that could  _smirk_ at a massacre like this. "Leave," she told him.

"I just got here."

"You want me to beat you again?"

He made a mocking sound. Suddenly he held a sword in his hand. "Shut that big mouth of yours. Or I'll chop off your other arm as well. You'll only suffer from it here anyway."

Aella clenched her teeth. He was crazy enough to do it.

"Where do we go?" she grumbled. The sooner they'd finish, the better. He clearly wasn't going to leave her voluntarily.

Loki shrugged his shoulders. "I have no idea."


	33. Beyond the Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki's POV

"Then what are you doing here?"

Loki looked around. "More than anything, I was curious." It was bizarre to walk around this place, in this world of ice and mist where death was omnipresent. "I don't know how this is possible, but it's absolutely fascinating."

He turned to Rota gain.  _Aella,_ he told himself. But now he saw Rota standing in front of him, he doubted they were different people. His memories of Rota weren't so clear he could remember the details of her face, but he'd seen Aella an hour ago and there was a scary resemblance. 

He wasn't surprised his memories of Rota had faded, but it was strange Brunnhilde hadn't seen the connection. They had been sisters. Or would memories fade even then? He had to admit he couldn't see the face of his own mother so clear either. 

Aella placed a hand on her hip while she gave him a critical look. Blood was still dripping from her shoulder, where an arm was missing. He nodded to the wound. "Doesn't that hurt?"

She followed his gaze and looked a bit crestfallen at it, as if she'd forgotten her arm was cut off. "Less than before."

"That must be because you are creating new memories instead of using Rota's," Loki mused out loud. This was all so fascinating...

"All this doesn't make any sense. I don't get it."

"Neither do I," he admitted. He'd said those words before he thought about it. Actually he hadn't want to tell her he wasn't in control of the situation. She had a strange impact on him, making him more honest than he usually was. 

Was that also the reason she'd seen through his illusion so easily? He needed to spend more time with Hayes if he wanted to be able to copy his behavior effortlessly. Sooner or later he could use it to his advantage, he was sure of it. 

Aella's eyes found his. Even though they had the same color as Rota's, there was a clear difference. The Valkyrie had always been fearless and full of confidence. The eyes showed doubts now, and fear. He felt the urge to say something comforting, but swallowed the words quickly. Sentimentality wouldn't help her. That's what the boy was for. 

"What will happen if I die now?" Her words were just a whisper. "Now this is more than a shared memory?" Her breathing faltered a moment when the look in her eyes became intenser. "What will happen if you die here?"

The corner of Loki's mouth curled up. "Are you telling me you would shed a tear for me?"

She didn't reply, but turned away from him to oversee their surroundings.

Loki thought about her words. It was a good question. He honestly had no idea what would happen. This whole action had been quite impulsive and he didn't even know how to return to the spaceship. "Let's just make sure things like that won't happen," he said, more to himself than to her. He took a few steps toward her, so they stood next to each other. Once again his eyes were drawn to the red waterfall coming out of her shoulder. 

"Let me heal your arm. Stop the bleeding."

She looked at him, with her large dark blue eyes. "You can do that?"

"Normally, yes."

With one hand he hugged her left shoulder, the other he pressed to the bleeding stump. He closed his eyes and let his power flew out of his hand. The flesh grew together. 

Aella took a step back. Her lips slightly parted, but it wasn't gratitude she showed him. "Why didn't you heal Rota?"

Loki shrugged his shoulders. He knew Rota rather would have died than living with the knowledge that  _all_ her sisters (except for Brunnhilde, it seemed) had died and her mission in life had failed. It had been a selfless action and for some reason he believed he looked weak if he admitted that out loud. He rather clothed himself in the harshness he was known for anyway. 

"You still hear them? The voices?"

She took a deep breath. "I don't know what we're doing here, Loki. You took the soul catcher away from this planet."

"Maybe we have to look beyond this planet?"

"How?"

He tilted his head a little. "You have wings."

A few seconds passed by. "You don't."

"No," he admitted. "That makes things a bit more complicated."


	34. Storm Wind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Aella started to wonder if Loki was  _really_ with her. Wasn't he just a product of her fantasy? Because she'd felt so lost? And because he'd been more helpful than anyone else, despite her distrust? 

He'd sworn he wouldn't help her before she went down on her knees, begging for his help and Loki didn't seem the type of guy that quickly reconsidered his words. Furthermore he didn't seem to be angry at all; he'd even healed the wound on her shoulder. 

Maybe she just wanted him to be around. Or had he really been this way in Rota's memory, on a very rare occasion? If she had really felt something for him, he couldn't have been an asshole all the time, right?"

And then his lack of determination. For a moment  _she_ had forgotten about his ability to change in whatever shape he wanted, but why would  _he_ forget about that? 

"What is it?" Loki asked. 

"You can just transform yourself in something with wings." She studied his face, but as usual it didn't show much of his thoughts. 

"Oh, that's right."

"That's right?" she repeated with raised eyebrows. "You aren't real, huh? You're just a product of my imagination."

The corner of his mouth curled up. "In that case I suggest you fantasize about something else." He wiggled his eyebrows. "Something less dangerous."

Suddenly she wondered how far Loki and Rota had gone. How much of her body had he seen? 

 _Rota's body,_ she reminded herself. But after Loki's first respons she wasn't so sure of that anymore. 

_But Loki is also a product of your fantasy._

Or maybe that was exactly what he wanted her to believe. 

She squeezed her eyes. She shouldn't pay so much attention to him and focus on the voices. That was the reason she was here. Loki was just an unfortunate side-effect. 

"What are you doing?"

"Shut your mouth for once," she grunted. "Make sure you can fly as I've found back the voices."

She tried to concentrate. It was dead quiet around them. Even the monster was silent, as if it wasn't in the mood for chasing the last two survivors. 

_Unless someone has so much influence on that beast it could force it to stay away._

She shook off the thought. She really needed to let go of Loki now. 

It wasn't easy. She heard his breathing, felt his eyes upon her. It almost felt like she was  _breathing_ him. And the voices... the voices were silent. 

Finally. 

Just as she  _did_ want to hear them. 

She opened her eyes and widened them in shock when she saw a young woman. Her hair was black and lush, but her facial traits and physique looked way too familiair. A scale armor covered her torso, the same she was wearing, and two dark feathered wings came out of her shoulders. 

"I thought you might want to see yourself."

A shiver crept down her spine as she heard her own voice. Deep down she was impressed by his powers, and at the same time she realized how easy he could misuse them and probably  _had_ misused them in the past. He could make someone disappear without anyone noticing it. 

Shocked she wondered if he could also hear her thoughts, but nothing pointed that way. 

Even though that wasn't saying much. Loki knew perfectly well when to keep things to himself. 

Aella tried to focus on the reason of their presence here again. "I hear the voices no longer." She hesitated. "I got the impression you are blocking them."

"Why would I do that?" Loki asked. He didn't look at her, but looked at his arms – he still had two of them – and with a smirk his hands moved over the protrusions in the armor, that protected the breasts.

Even though it called up indignation, she ignored the feelings, knowing provoking a response was all he wanted. "Maybe you're not aware of it."

Loki lowered his  – or her – arms again and looked at her. "You know what I think? I think you've found all the answers Rota wanted to give you. The voices no longer have something to say to you."

"All the answers?" she repeated. All she got, were more questions. "Which ones exactly?"

"That you're Rota."

"How is that an  _answer_?" She stared at her spitting image. She couldn't stand it another moment. "And please go back to your own shape."

Loki did as she asked. "I knew you liked me."

She rolled her eyes. "Be a little more specific."

"Later. First we need to leave this place. We're here for a scary long time."

Aella shook her head. "No, I want answers first. In case you aren't  _really_ here."

Loki gave her a penetrating look and tilted his head a little. "That's... an interesting perspective."

Aella gritted her teeth. Why did she share that thought? "Don't act like some ignorant asshole when we're back."

He chuckled. "Now why would I do that?"

She glared at him. "Because you're Loki."

"Or a projection of your own fantasy." He shrugged his shoulders. "It doesn't matter anyway. I have the feeling you have a pretty accurate image of me. More interesting is the question:  _who are you?_ Rota. Aella. You ever wondered if it's a coincidence you've been called after an Amazon, a mythological warrior? Her name means something like "storm wind". And guess what Rota's powers were?" He paused just to tease her. "She could create storm winds and lightning."  


	35. A Second Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

"Lightning?" she repeated. 

"Yep. If I hadn't liked you so much myself, I might have  _shipped_ you with Thor."

Aella's doubtful look glided across his face. Was he talking about Rota or her? 

_Probably neither of you. Why do you care?_

Aella shook off the question and focused on the thought that had shot through her head before Loki had made that stupid remark. "That lightning that hit me... where after my powers awakened... That wasn't a coincidence, was it? But what does it mean? Am I possessed by her?"

Loki rolled his eyes. "You've hidden the intelligence that characterized Rota very deeply, didn't you? Rota didn't suddenly "take you over". You  _are_ Rota. When she died, she somehow turned back to her baby-form, or whatever you want to call it, and for some reason she made sure your memories – or at least the most important ones – came back around your maturity." Loki ran a hand across his smooth chin. "I wonder how she did it. It sounds like a power that's beyond the might of a Valkyrie. Especially one that's dying." 

The last sentences Loki spoke, didn't really land. She thought about the confession of her mother: that she'd been a foundling.

It was true. It fitted the story.

Still all this was too much to comprehend. Had she really lived another life? "Then where are my other memories?" she wondered out aloud.

"Clearly she only passed the most important ones."

His eyes were glistening, there was a sparkling enthusiasm she didn't fully understand. Especially not when she drew an ironic conclusion.

"That wasn't much. That all Valkyries have died, that you've locked them up and that I should especially not trust you."

The sparkle in Loki's eyes seemed to extinguish. "Well, even Valkyries make errors in judgment now and then. To prevent you from making another one: we really should go back now. No matter how fantastic it is to be around you, I have a little more ambition than staying in your head until it's getting dark here for good."

"Yeah? You want to lock up more people in the soul catcher?" she asked on a just as sarcastic tone. "You might have an idea of how they're feeling right now."

"Not at all. Nobody is crying in pain here. Compared to the place where they are, this must be some kind of Walhalla."

A cloud passed over Aella's face. Why was she still surprised by his insensitivity? Now and then a treacherous affection sneaked up on her, but only for a little while. She had to guard her heart better, so she wouldn't give Loki the chance to betray her.

For that moment would come. Every cell in her body was convinced of that. Still he was right; they indeed had to leave this place. The question however was: how? Usually she died. Should she ask Loki to plunge a blade through her heart? 

She didn't want to give him that pleasure. Furthermore they were already beyond her memories, he'd told her. She wasn't sure she would return to this place.

"I really don't know how to go back. Normally I have already woken up by now."

What if Loki's presence was too much for her mind? What if he was the reason she couldn't travel back? 

"Think about the room in which you were lying. Think about the kid. Wait, I'll help you." For a moment his appearance faltered, then Hayes stood in front of her. 

Relief was flowing through her veins, until she realized it was nothing but an illusion. Hayes wasn't really here. She searched for the peace in his eyes, but they were too alert, too compelling. 

She squeezed her eyes, searched in her memories for his calm face, his friendly smile. 

"Hayes," she whispered to herself. "I wanna go back to Hayes."


	36. Murderous Minds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hayes' POV

Hayes didn't consider himself as a very aggressive human being. He wasn't the kind of person letting people walk over him and he had been involved in some fights, but he wasn't seeing red all the time. 

Still he had a hard time not to wrap his hands around the man's neck to strangle him. His imagination had already shown him how the face of the god would turn pale, how his body would convulse. 

On any other day he would have felt ashamed of these feelings, but not today. Not with Loki. Who probably had fantasies like these by everyone he met. The only thing keeping him from harming the god, who he would never find weaker than now, was the fear it would affect Aella. After all, their minds were melted together now. They both were lying motionlessly, one on the bed, the other on the ground. 

Hayes could only guess what influence this would have on Aella. Loki had violently invaded her thoughts, her mind. She hadn't given him permission to do so, in fact, she'd specifically told him she did not want him to do such a thing.

And what had Hayes done to protect her? He'd let that stupid god bluff him. Loki had claimed he was the only one who could bring her back, but in the meantime she was unconscious for at least an hour and she still didn't wake up. 

Whatever Loki was doing, he wasn't helping at all. 

With a cramped face he turned to Thor and Brunnhilde, who he had called a while back. "Isn't there anything we can do?"

Thor pulled a not very brainy face. "I do not know much about those matters."

Hopefully Hayes looked at the Valkyrie. In her eyes a fierceness was burning that had to be a reflection of his own anger. She too would love to take advantage of Loki's vulnerability. 

"I'm afraid we will only cause her harm." The Valkyrie crossed her arms. "But this behavior is crossing the line, Thor. Even for Loki. Will my mind be the next he invades? Or yours?"

"I did not even know he was capable of this," Thor muttered. It sounded like an apology. "Certainly not without hypnosis."

Hayes pressed his lips together. He had to do something. "Can't you bring her back with a little jolt or something? You're the god of thunder, right? After all, it was lightning that brought her all this misery in the first place."

"I don't know what effect that will have."

Hayes stood up and paced through the room, as he'd done at times since the two were unconscious. And he called himself a god? He couldn't do a damn thing! Of all people it was Loki who showed godly powers and the powerlessness was driving Hayes crazy. 

He wished he could do something himself, he was craving for some kind of power with which he could protect Aella from that insane dickhead. For it was clear Loki wouldn't leave her alone anytime soon and he had the feeling Aella didn't realize what horrible things he was capable of. She was so keen on finding answers she would step right into an abyss. 

Someone gasped for air. Hayes turned around immediately. Aella had widened her eyes and jumped up. Wildly she looked around. 

Hayes ran straight to her, "accidentally" kicking Loki's head on his way over. The god was still passed out. 

Holding his breath he observed Aella, expecting her to collaps again, or her eyes starting to bleed or that Loki's voice would come out of her mouth– or whatever other horror.

She panted, her eyes shot through the room and rested upon Loki. 

"Loki?" She jumped off the bed and dropped on her knees next to him. "Loki?" Her voice cracked as she shook his shoulders. 

Blood glided out of his nose, found a way out between his lips. 

"What happened?" Thor stepped forward, his face worried. 

Hayes exchanged a look with the Valkyrie. Their thoughts followed the same path: exactly what he deserves. 

"Is he dead?" Hayes asked, a little too hopeful. 

A breath brushed her ear. "Would you like that?"

Shocked, Hayes looked over his shoulder, staring right into Loki's face. His glance was cold as ice. Hayes' stomach twisted painfully. 

Aella turned her head aside as she heard Loki's voice. He didn't know what expression dominated her face: anger, indignation or relief.


	37. A Divine Kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

"Ah, just allow me a minute of fun for once. I was just curious about your reaction." Loki smirked at Aella, who gritted her teeth. 

There was no doubt he had enjoyed her reaction.

Loki walked past Hayes to the door and turned to Brunnhilde. "We can leave Midgard. We need to go to Alfheim."

"Alfheim? What do we have to do there?"

"Finding a passage to Muspelheim."

Her face grew dark. "Why in Odin's name would we go there?"

"In Odin's name we're not going anywhere. He's dead, remember?"

She grimaced. "What business do we have in Muspelheim?"

Loki motioned with his chin to Aella. "We discovered something in her dream world."

"We did?" Aella asked confused. Loki was drawing conclusions she didn't understand. 

"That's where the soul catcher is. Probably. And since Bifröst is destroyed and Asgard no longer exists, Alfheim is our best chance. There we can find portals to the other realms."

Brunnhilde snorted. "Those haven't been used in centuries."

"You're wrong."

"This is all well and good..." Thor raised his voice. "But can someone please explain to me what exactly you have discovered and what we are going to do?"

"I'm afraid that will be beyond your comprehension, brother." Loki smirked provokingly at the god of thunder, who only uttered a grunt. 

"Loki believes I'm Rota," Aella explained. She sat down on the bed, hoping it would calm down the others. It felt like everyone was holding a container of firework that could explode any moment. "He just copied the shape I am in my dreams and I have to admit she looked terrifying similar."

"Nonsense," Brunnhilde growled. 

"Not everyone is quick on the uptake. Let me show you." Loki's appearance faltered before Rota appeared in the room. He sat down next to Aella– annoyingly close. 

Brunnhilde's eyes widened. Hissing, she breathed in. 

"You see? Only their hair colors differ. And if Aella had let her hair down for once, we might have noticed earlier, but their faces are exactly the same. She just has a different accent because someone else taught her to speak."

Loki changed back before she could say something about it.

"But how is that possible?" Thor asked. His eyes were almost dropping out of their sockets. 

"One of the biggest mysteries of the universe."

Aella poked Loki's side. "Don't be so pompous."

His eyes were sparkling. Aella looked a bit longer at them than she realized – and when she did catch herself in doing so, she quickly turned away her face. Her eyes were now crossing Brunnhilde's, who clearly showed her she wasn't a big fan of this sisterly reunion.

"Right before Rota died, she brought herself back to her purest form and transported herself to Midgard. As a baby. She only kept a few memories," Loki explained. His tone was colored by fascination. 

Brunnhilde crossed her arms. "Valkyries lack such a power. I don't buy it."

Aella bit her bottom lip and contemplated the right words. "I don't know if I believe this either, Brunnhilde," she said quietly, but still clearly audible. "And it doesn't matter. What I do know, is that I'm hearing voices that are coming from the soul catcher in which Loki has trapped the other Valkyries. So whether I'm really Rota or not, doesn't matter. I  _have_ to find the soul catcher, otherwise I'll go crazy, and Loki will help me find it. You have to decide for yourself if you want to help us, but we will take this ship."

Brunnhilde raised her eyebrows. "Don't be so naive, girl. Loki never helped anyone but himself."

"And you did?" Aella shot back. "At least he  _pretends_ to be helpful."

She rolled her eyes. "Do whatever you want." She turned around and walked away. Aella had the feeling her stomach was cringing. This was her sister. The only one who was still alive. And she reacted... this way? 

"So we are going to Alfheim?" Thor asked. "Fine by me. At least the beer is good there. It's been years since I have been there."

"And me?" It was the first thing Hayes said. His face was pale. Was that because of the prospect to undertake a space mission or because he had decided his adventure would end here? 

"What do you mean?" Aella asked hesitantly. "You are coming with us, right?" She didn't know how to complete this journey without him. She couldn't even imagine there had been a time she had been annoyed by him. 

"I rather don't decline a space trip and I rather cut off my own hand than leaving you behind with that sociopath. But I foresee some problems. For example the fact that I am just a human who probably can't even breathe on other planets."

"You just need a bit of divinity," Loki answered bored. 

"And I can get that where? At the drugstore?"

Suddenly Thor started to grin. "You have to kiss her!"

Aella looked up, confused. Where was that coming from? She glanced at Loki, hoping he could explain the strange leaps of his brother. His lips turned into a smirk as well. 

"It's that simple. At intimate contact, you, as a Valkyrie, lose a bit of your power which you will give to him. That will be enough."

"Eh..." Aella looked a bit overwhelmed at Hayes. His cheeks flushed. 

"You can make out with Thor too," Loki suggested. "That works as well. Or with Brunnhilde, but she's so moody I would fear she bit off my tongue." He chuckled. "In theory, even I am an option. But no, obviously I'm not going to donate my powers to a trivial mortal."

Hayes snorted. "You don't? Glad to hear that, choosing between you and Aella was a real difficult task."

Aella looked awkwardly from Hayes to the two brothers, who didn't prepare to leave. "And... You'll stay around to watch?"

"Absolutely," Loki smirked. "I wouldn't want to miss this spectacle."

* * *

**Hey guys! What do you think of the story? Please share your thoughts! (:**

 


	38. Going Home

Aella rolled her eyes. "I assume it's a long journey to Alfheim, so I'm not in a hurry. I'll do it when there are no eager eyes aimed at us."

Thor roared with laughter. 

Loki gave her a wink.

Yes, a  _wink._ It was  _so_ unlike Loki – and at the same time it was. He did everything in his power to confuse her. 

"Speaking of a long journey... During the outward journey I was almost dying of boredom. So let's bring some earthly pleasures aboard before we leave."

Aella frowned as she looked at Loki. "Sounds like you want to invite some strippers?"

"Unless you can't handle the competition?"

Aella shook her head, wondering why she was even trying to have a conversation with him. 

_Because you enjoy it. No matter how hard you deny it: he's just a challenging conversationalist._

She wondered if these were her own thoughts or that Loki's were somehow still linked with hers. His facial expression however didn't create that impression. 

"You're right," she admitted. 

"You're afraid you can't handle the competition?"

"Just let me finish my sentence. We all need some distraction. The last thing I want, is talking to you for months."

"There are others things we can do, you know." Loki's eyes signaled to the bed. 

Aella felt her cheeks flush. The most embarrassing thing wasn't even his suggestion, but the fact that Hayes and Thor were listening quietly. 

"I want books, I wanna know everything about the nine realms."

"Eight, Asgard has exploded."

She sent him a warning glare. If he interrupted her one more time, his face would meet the wall again. Surrendering, he raised his hands and motioned her to continue. 

"Going to a library won't be enough," Hayes told her, as if he had found the courage to speak only by now. "We can't just disappear. We have to talk to our parents, make up a good excuse... Say goodbye..." He gave her an intense look. 

She needed a couple of seconds to realize what he was insinuating. There was a chance that they would never return, that they would die in one of these worlds. They couldn't just disappear.

"You're right. We have to go back home first. Get some stuff, not only books." She turned towards Thor. "How long will the journey take?"

"You better count on four months before we reach another planet."

She heaved a deep sigh. For months in a spaceship with Loki. How long did she know him now? Two days? He was already exhausting her. She'd better gather a lot of distraction. Not only for herself; especially for him. 

For a moment an image of a game of Risk crossed her minds, whereby he was trying to conquer the world. The hell, why not? If they were stuck with each other for months, they might as well try the earthly assortiment of board games. 

"We have to book a new flight," Hayes said. "Let's agree that we will be back here within a week?"

"What a waste of time," Loki interfered. 

"You're immortal, what's the big deal?" 

"I'll teleport you."

"Hell no. I'm not going to show you where I live," Aella objected. 

He smirked. 

It was a smirk that showed her that there was no point in arguing with him. 

* * *

Only a few minutes later they found themselves in Bristol, in the busy street where Aella's apartment was situated. Loki was now wearing a dark jeans and and a green with black checkered shirt, of which he had rolled up the sleeves up to his elbows. He fitted in very well. 

Hayes looked hesitating at her. It was clear he didn't want to leave her alone with Loki, but Aella thought it would be wiser if they didn't join him visiting his parents. They had decided to announce that they had won a trip around the world. 

"We'll see each other here tonight, okay?" she said.   
  
Hayes nodded.  "Yeah, sure." He bowed towards her and kissed her cheek. Right before he pulled back his face, he whispered: "Please be careful, Aella. Don't forget who he is."

"I'll be fine," she assured him. She forced her lips into a smile, although the rest of their plan made her nervous. Her mother would never believe that she would waste her money on lotteries. The only thing she could think of, was that Loki would pretend to be her boyfriend, taking her with him on a trip. That was weird – of course it was weird. But she couldn't rely on Hayes' talent to lie and truth to be told: lying was something in which Loki was standing out. For some  reason her mother always knew when people pretended to be someone else or were plagued by nervousness and she wouldn't have to fear something like that would happen to Loki.

She hadn't informed Loki about his role yet – he was already annoying enough. It would take a few hours before her mother would return from work, so until then they better spend their time wisely. 

"Well, where do we have to go?" Loki looked across the street. 

Aella took a deep breath. There was no way around it. 

"This way," she said, crossing the street.

 


	39. Music Lessons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

It felt like an enormous violation of her privacy when she took Loki to her apartment. Except Hayes, she had never invited a boy – or a man – inside. Actually, there hadn't been a lot of visitors at all. There was an awkward silence between them, although Aella doubted that it would bother Loki too. She took off her cardigan and hung it on the coat rack. Not because she planned on staying here for a long time, but because she suddenly felt awfully hot.

Aella led Loki through the hallway, inside the living room. A little lost she crossed her arms, holding her elbow with the opposite hand. This felt so weird. Usually she would offer a guest something to drink, but this was anything but a normal situation and now they suddenly were in a normal room, she didn't know how to act.

Her eyes flashed to her guest. He also looked a little less self-confident than she had gotten used to. He circled through the room, keeping his silence all the time.

"Gosh, this is so awkward." The words slipped her lips before she realized. "Can you wait outside?"

He looked up. "You really want that?"

She didn't know what exactly she was reading his eyes, but his gaze seemed to paralyse her. Just like his question, by the way. It wasn't exactly natural that he cared about her opinion.

She suppressed a sigh. "Nah, never mind. I'll go gather some stuff. If you want a drink or something, just take it from the fridge. And you can turn on the tv too."

Then the silence would at least be gone.

It was a strange observation. The last time that she had been here, the lack of silence had almost driven her to madness and now she longed for the presence of sound.

Before Loki could say something, she fled to her bedroom. With her heel she closed the door, then she pulled the suitcase from under the bed. Opening the wardrobe, she looked at the different shelves. What should she take? Long pants? Shorts? Sweaters, tops? How was the climate in Alfheim, and on that other planet, which name she had forgotten?

On a reflex she grabbed her phone to open Google, but she quickly realized that she wouldn't find any reliable information on it. Her only source was Loki and she didn't want to go back to him yet. For that reason, she started to load her underwear and socks. She added her bikini too, not taking a shower for months wasn't an option.

Her phone, which she had laid on the bed when she started packing, buzzed. The screen lit up and she bent towards the device.

_Everything going wel?_

Although she knew that Hayes' intentions were good and that his worries weren't unfounded, his concern was a little annoying. She might feel uncomfortable around Loki, but she could handle him. All she send back, was a thumb, the she returned to her wardrobe. How long was she in her bedroom? Probably five minutes at most. She sat down on the bed, caressing the blanket. A deep sigh followed.

She heard the parquet floor creak on the other side of the wall. What was he doing? She tried to remember if there were things she didn't want him to see, but she hadn't much personal stuff, not even pictures.

Still there was a tightness in her chest when she heard the strings of her harp. The instrument had never been touched by the fingers of anyone but herself and she hated the thought that he would break it. It had taken her years to buy it. Opening the door, she watched Loki from the doorway, who was standing in the opposite corner, next to the instrument. His fingers were stroking the strings with a tenderness she had never expected from him.

"You know how to play harp?" she asked surprised. "I'd rather taken you for a drum-type."

He lowered his arms and turned around. "Odin valued music, so he saddled us with various instruments. I never excelled in any of them." He shrugged his shoulders. "But when we are locked up for months in a spaceship..."

"I'm not going to drag a harp."

"All it takes to get it there, is a little bit of magic."

Her glance wandered from his face to the instrument. It would be nice if she could led her thoughts travel away on the music now and then. But she knew beforehand that she would attract some listeners and she had never played around someone else before. Maybe Loki would even ask her to teach him how to play.

Red spots crept upwards in her neck. She could better find a hobby in which he had no interest.

_Is that really what you want? There's a reason you're feeling so hot..._

With an angry frown, she looked at Loki again. These were words he could have said easily, but his neutral face made her doubt.

She hated that voice. That insinuated that she liked Loki's company. He was a mass murderer. A sociopath. She should  _never_ forget that.

She decided to end the awkward moment by asking him a totally different question. "I don't know what clothes to take. Has Alfheim a warm climate? And... that other area?"

"Alfheim is tropical," Loki answered. "Muspelheim mainly exists of lava. So yeah, it's a bit warm." He turned his attention to the harp again, his hand slipping across the wooden arch.

Then he disappeared, together with the instrument.

With a sigh, Aella returned to her wardrobe.

So Loki wanted harp lessons. Probably, that hadn't much to do with the instrument itself; he just loved to see her outraged reaction

It felt like a vicious cycle. She  _wanted_ to react outraged because she would forget about his wicked heart otherwise; and that response encouraged Loki to keep challenging her.

"These are going to be long, long days," she sighed as she started to transfer her summer clothes from the closet to the suitcase.


	40. The Perfect Man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

Aella had packed all her stuff. She put her suitcase in the living room,  made a hot chocolate and  sat down on the couch, blowing into the steamy cup. Actually the weather was too nice for such a drink, but who knew when would be the next time she'd be able to drink it. It might as well be never.

Aella enjoyed the silence. The voices were still silent. A question was itching her mind.  _Do I still need to leave?_

Maybe not. Maybe she had already lived up to the expectations of the voices. But could she take that risk? What if they would come back as soon as the spaceship was gone? Furthermore, she would be crazy for refusing to go to another planet, right? There was nothing tying her to this place anyway. Except for a mother who had turned out to be not her mother.

She leaned a little more against the backrest of the couch, trying to relax. It wasn't easy; her thoughts were flashing into every direction, trying to come up with things she had forgotten to pack and might be helpful. 

And she thought about Loki. 

Would he even return? There was no doubt that he would find it hilarious to just let her down now. Or maybe he had already returned, waiting curiously what she would do. The thought caused goosebumps; never before there had been such an unpredictable aspect in her life and she wondered if it would ever truly go away. 

She glanced at the clock. Half past three. Loki was gone for at least an hour. Was it smarter to visit her mom all alone? She could pretend that she was angry because her mother had lied to her her whole life, she wouldn't need to act like she had a boyfriend wanting to take her for a trip around the world. Still she dreaded being alone with her mom.

_And you really think you would feel more comfortable when Loki is around?_

She folded her hands a little tighter around the mug. There was no way to answer that in a positive way. It probably was way easier without Loki, but would it be just as convincing? She clung to the thought that he was universe's best liar.

_Although my mom shares that talent. Maybe they even like each other._

She took another sip. 

_And what about you? You like him too?_

She put away the mug. Her own thoughts started to annoye her. She was almost longing back to the dying whispers of her sisters. 

_That's cruel, Aella. Very cruel._

Suddenly the fridge opened and closed. And a drawer. Footsteps, then Loki appeared in the door leading from the kitchen to the living room. He was holding a beer in his hand, taking a swig. "You want one too?"

"Eh..." Although the noises in the kitchen had already announced his return, his nonchalance still surprised her. "Okay," she added as she realized she was sounding stupid. 

He walked up to her, handing her the bottle from which he had just drank. Then he returned to the kitchen, getting a new one for himself. 

The glass felt cold against her skin, contrasting with the warm mug. 

 _Hot chocolate and beer isn't the best combination._ Her eyes flashed to the bottle Loki was holding, but it felt childish to say that she wanted that one. 

Pushing away the thought that his lips had also touched the opening – even though it had only been for a split second – she took a swig, trying to swallow the awkwardness as well. 

The couch sagged a bit when Loki sat down next to her.  He turned towards her, stretching his leg so he could pull something out of his pocket. He put a pile of money on the coffee table. "To hire some strippers."

"Wha-what?"

He chuckled. "Joking. Or maybe I'm not. You know, just to buy some entertainment. Bet the shops are still open."

"You stole this?" It was a stupid question.  _Of course_ he had stolen this. It was hard to believe that they paid with pounds in Asgard. 

He shrugged, deciding not to answer. She didn't need one anyway; she could easily picture how that had went. Like some wizard he had apparated in Gringotts, taking a sum of money with him. 

She couldn't stop the smirk crossing her face. It was so bizarre. And his arrogance was both fascinating and scaring her at the same time.

"Why are you doing this, Loki?" she asked after taking another sip. 

"You think I got better things to do at the moment?"

She looked at him, hesitating. He had a point, but still...

He moved the bottle back to his mouth and drank. She stared at his neck, to his Adam's apple bobbing up and down. As she realized what she was doing, she quickly turned away her face.  _What the hell are you doing, Aella._

She had no idea, but her cheeks felt warm and she had to suppress the urge to press the cold glass of her beer against her skin. She was waiting for a cynical remark from Loki, but he asked a neutral question. 

"What's your plan? Hayes went home. You wanted to go to your parents too, right? Well, at least the ones pretending to be them..."

Ouch. Ruthlessly, he hit the nail on the head. Suddenly her plan sounded foolish. But having  _no_ plan, was even worse. 

"I'm afraid my mom will see through me when I'm lying. So... I hoped you'd be the one lying to her."

"You want me to go with you to your mom?"

She peeked aside. He had raised his eyebrows and she forced herself to look him in the eye. "I want you to pretend that your my rich boyfriend who had booked a trip around the world before we met, and who doesn't want to be that long without his new girl."

"Where's the lie in that?"

Aella wished she could rip off her cheeks when they were glowing. She  _hated_ herself. Why the hell did she feel so... idiotic? He was handsome. On sporadic moments he was even friendly.

But that was all. That  _should be_ all. "So you'll help me out?" she insisted, trying to wrestle away from the shame. There was no way that he hadn't seen her blushing cheeks, but miraculously he wasn't grinning like an idiot. It should made her suspicious. 

Loki shrugged his shoulders. "Yeah, sure. So, tell me what kind of men you feel attracted to. An arrogant dick like Tony Stark? The decent Captain America? A nerdy Hulk – sorry, can't remember what he calls his boring side, doctor something. Or do you prefer a savage like my brother?"

"Uh..." Again she didn't know what to say.  _Ugh, where did my wit go?!_ She vaguely waved with her hand. "This is fine."

"Really? I'm the perfect man in your eyes?"

"I think you look okay," she shrugged.

"Now I think you're putting it too lightly."

She squeezed the bottle of beer so tightly that a crack appeared in the glass. Cursing, she put it away. Drops found their way through the crack, rolling down. 

"Lets go," she said before Loki could say something about it. She stood up, wiping her hand to her pants.

Loki took the last sip. A confident smirk was on his face and his eyes seemed to lit up. "Tell me where to go."

Aella summed up the address. Loki grabbed her upper arm and for a moment all oxygen was squeezed out of her lungs. Before she could panic, she found herself a few meters away from her mother's house. They had appeared in someone's front yard, and an old lady stared at them with wide eyes.

Quickly Aella walked away, trying to calm herself down. She walked a few steps in front of Loki, climbing up the stairs leading to the front door and ringing the bell. 

Loki's hand slipped in hers, their fingers lacing. Wildly, she turned her head towards him. 

"What? We're a couple now, right?" What he showed her should probably look like a charming smile, but she only saw a bold smirk in it. "You seem like a  _really_  clingy girlfriend." 


	41. Awkwardness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aella's POV

_A clingy girlfriend? Yeah, you wish..._ "I'm not," she grunted. 

A key was put in the hole. Before the door swung open, Loki leaned closer to her and whispered: "Too bad. Your rich boyfriend really has to convince your mother that he won't survive a trip around the world without his girlfriend."

She turned away her head, unconsciously exposing her neck to him. For a moment his lips found the crook of her neck. Immediately goosebumps spread across her arms. Her cheeks got warm, and right at that moment her mother opened the door.

"Aella!" she responded surprised. 

Aella was still so confused by Loki's inappropriate behavior that she couldn't say her words right; she just stammered some syllables. 

"Good day, ma'me," Loki said smoothly. "I'm Levi. What a pleasure to meet you. You are a beauty, just like your daughter." He held out his hand. When her mother wanted to shake it, he pressed a kiss to the back of it. 

"I'm going to puke." The words slipped her lips before she realized it.

"Aella!" her mother answered indignantly. 

Red spots crept up her neck. Shame heated her face in such a way that she was afraid that her clothes would catch fire.

"Aella drank a little too much. She was nervous to introduce me to you, I understood your last encounter wasn't a very friendly one."

Her mother bent her head and said nothing.

 _Thank you._ In a clever way he had hidden her clumsiness. 

"Please, come in, Levi. I'm so happy you're here! I didn't know that..." For a moment she studied Aella's face, as if she was silently asking permission to label their relationship. 

"Well, we've only just met."

 _Another dumb comment. Way to go, Aella. Really convincing that you're leaving with him for a year._ She paid more attention to Loki's hand in hers than to the words she blurred out. It felt like he had made a spell that changed her brain into jelly. 

Of course Loki figured that out too. They were barely sitting on the couch when her mother fled to the kitchen to make coffee; for Loki the perfect moment to watch her with frowned eyebrows. "Now I understand why you picked me as your knight in shining armor, instead of Hayes. You really are a fool." He whispered the words, although it felt like he was screaming them. 

Awkwardly she shifted in her seat. No way that she was going to admit that he was messing with her head. "I'm just not good at this," he muttered. "And you do everything so exaggerated."

Loki kept her glance. For far too long. She felt that she started to sweat, she must smell quite a bit by now. 

"You never had a boyfriend, did you?"

 _Ugh!_ Her face had to be purple by now. She wanted to deny it, laugh at his words, but it was the truth and he knew it. 

"Well I haven't had an eternity to find a soulmate," she hissed. 

Loki chuckled. "Calm down, honey." He held out his hand and stroked a strand of her hair behind her ear. She wanted to slap away his hand, but right at that moment her mother returned with three cups of coffee.

She didn't know what made her clench her fists tighter: his smirk or the twinkle in his eyes. Laying an arm across the armrest, he ordered her with his eyes to snuggle up to him. Extremely reluctantly, she scooted closer to him, if only to make this act more believable.

"You want sugar, Levi? Or milk?"

"Black is fine, ma'me."

Sarcasm dripped from every word and still Aella knew that she was the only one noticing it. 

"Oh, this is such a surprise!" With a wide smile, her mother studied Loki's face. She was clearly impressed. Sure, that had been her intention, but deep down Aella didn't like it at all. 

"How long are the two of you together?"

"I met her half a year ago, but three weeks ago we admitted our feelings to each other."

Aella cringed as his lips touched her temple. Again her fingers clenched to fists. This really was the most dumb idea she had ever had. She should have asked Thor to come with her.

"It's kinda cute that you try so hard to show that you don't like this," he whispered in her ear. "For I know you do."

She jumped up, muttering that she needed to go to the bathroom. Leaning with her hands on the wash basin, she looked into the mirror. Her cheeks were flaming red.  Quickly she turned on the water and splashed it into her face. It barely helped.  _You have to pull yourself together, Aella. Just play along; just start to giggle if you can't stop those red cheeks. That also fits a first crush._

She sat down on the toilet and waited until her heated face was cooled down. She took her phone from her pocket, opened What's App and opened the conversation with Hayes. 

 _Is everything going well at home?_ she typed.  _Loki pretends to be my boyfriend to convinced my ma not to worry about me when we're on a trip around the world. It's sooo embarrassing and he's messing with me the whole time, but it's nothing to worry about. It works, I think. I'm glad when you're back with us. X_

Sharing her thoughts with Hayes helped a little, even when she didn't get an answer immediately. She put away her phone again, stood up and looked into the mirror. Her cheeks were still flushed, but it could have been worse. Straightening her shoulders, she opened the door and returned to the living room.

From a distance she watched Loki, who was talking to her mother in his normal voice, now and then showing her a friendly smile. She couldn't help but wonder what a genuine smile from him would look like. When he caught her staring, he gave her a conspiring wink. 

Suppressing a sigh, she sat down next to him again.  _You can do this, Aella. You can do this._ She banished all her feelings, grabbed Loki's hand that was resting on her knee and ignored the way his thumb was slowly gliding across her knuckle.  
  
"I just told your mother that I'm a tv producer." Loki gave her an intense look. 

It took a few moments before she realized that he had talked himself in a corner.  _Then choose a normal profession, idiot._

"That's right, mom. Lo- uh, Levi works for MTV. He's involved in different shows."

If there was a channel her mother never watched, it had to be that one. Suddenly an idea popped up. 

"From Monday he's going to follow some artists, all across the world."

Loki understood her plan and nodded. "I am! It's fantastic. I will leave the country for a couple of months..."

 _"_ And I'm going with him!" she added, forcing herself to give him an amorous look. Loki held her glance and for a moment she forgot that her mother was sitting across from her and that this was nothing but an act. 

She didn't know who of them moved his face closer, but suddenly her lips were only an inch away from his.


	42. Goodbyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hayes' POV

Saying goodbye had been harder than expected. Ten minutes ago Hayes had closed the door of his parent's house and since then he was walking around pointlessly. There was a pit in his stomach. Maybe he would never see his parents again. 

Taking a few deep breaths, he tried to man up. A real man would never walk away from an adventure like this. How many times had he been staring out of the window during college, begging for a change, something that could pump the adrenaline through his veins?

And now that time had finally come, he was backing off. 

 _No, I'm not backing off. I'm just aware of the things I'm leaving behind,_ he told himself. He looked at his phone. He would meet his two best friends within ten minutes, but he actually had no idea what to say to them. He wished he had made a selfie with Thor, then there was at least some proof of his story.

As he headed for the shopping area, his thoughts wandered to Aella and Loki. He didn't really know what to think about them. Well – actually he knew that very well. He hated the fact that Loki was constantly hovering around her and that she kept seeking his company. Could she fall in love with him? No, right? That was like falling in love with Osama Bin Laden. Aella wasn't that crazy, she could see through his looks, right? And he wasn't  _that_ handsome, was he? Hayes wouldn't want to switch bodies. 

But what did Loki want from  _her?_ That was a question occupying his mind since the very beginning. If he had just wanted to tease her, he'd probably been bored by now. It couldn't be helpfulness alone; he was trying way too hard. There had to be some kind of plan, and that was what was worrying him. Hayes didn't want something to happen to her, maybe that was the most important reason for participating in this crazy mission.

Somehow it felt idiotic; being willing to sacrifice everything for a girl who had turned him down. There however was more. This wasn't some kind of desperate attempt to conquer her heart; he was realistic and knew that wasn't going to happen. He just felt that she would need him; that many people were going to need him. Or maybe that was just what he wanted; feeling relevant.

Meanwhile he had reached the bar where he would meet with Jelle and Matt and he shook their hands. 

"Where the hell have you been man?" Matt asked. 

Hayes gestured inside. "I'll tell you in a minute."

That was what he would really do. Tell them the truth.

* * *

"You got a screw loose up there?" Jelle frowned after Hayes had finished his story. "You smoked some shit?"

Matt was suspiciously quiet. They had grown up together. Matt knew he exaggerated his stories now and then, but he had never made up one. 

"You believe this?" Jelle asked with skyrocketed eyebrows. 

Matt shrugged his shoulders. "Those days Inhumans are popping out of the ground like mushrooms. If you watch the news..."

"That's all bullshit to keep us away from the real news," Jelle answered cynically. "You don't really believe that crap, right?" 

Matt shrugged his shoulders. 

"Loki will pick me up later. You'll see for yourself."

 _At least I hope he will. Maybe Loki prefers to leave_ without  _me._

Goose bumps spread across his arms. Could he persuade Aella to do such a thing? If he was honest, he hadn't many doubts. He was the master of manipulation. It wouldn't be that hard to convince her to leave without an insignificant human being like him. 

 _No, that's not true,_ he said sternly to himself.  _She just texted you she'd be happy when you're back with them. She needs you. It's exactly a_ normal  _human being she needs._

Jelle snorted. He clearly didn't buy it for a minute. Still his disbelief wasn't that big that he walked away. 

"I told my parents that I won a trip around the world," he said. "It's better if they don't know the truth."

"The first wise words I hear from you today," Jelle said sharply. "If they go to the police and claim that you are abducted by aliens, they'll take them to a mental institution."

"Exactly." Hayes rolled his eyes. "Maybe I should have put you off with a simple lie too."

Jelle held his glance and remained silent.


	43. On The Right Track

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki's POV

For a moment it felt like he was hypnotized by her eyes. He moved his fingers a little, felt the urge to lift them and caress her face. Right before their lips touched, Aella turned her face away. 

Loki wished she hadn't. There was a nagging feeling in his chest, alarming him.  _I'm really growing too attached to her._

He was temped to laugh that thought off, but he knew there was a truth in it. For what the hell was he even doing right now? Playing Aella's boyfriend to comfort her mother? Sure, he liked teasing her, but he also knew he was setting boundaries, that he was genuinely trying not to  _hurt_ her. 

_So? What if I care about someone for once? Why should I worry about that? One day she'll die, probably sooner than I would like. But I'll get over it._

He knew how things were. He found her attractive and although she was trying really hard to hide that she found him attractive too, he knew she did. Why would he fight against that? They could just have some fun, there was no need to make a scene.

Loki aimed his attention back to the woman who had pretended to be Aella's mother. She smiled at them, looking from one to another. Their so-called chemistry was apparently convincing enough to cover for Aella's forthcoming absence.

He couldn't resist taking Aella's hand in his, although he didn't know if he did it to mess with her, to make their pretended love more natural or because her warm skin against his just felt damn good. For now she would at least allow him to touch her.

Loki answered the questions of the woman, going back to a conversation. Aella was silently staring forward and it didn't take long before she pulled away her hand, announcing that she had to call a friend. 

 _Hayes._ He wondered what thoughts would occupy that kid's mind right now. He was about to start a suicide mission, and Loki doubted he knew that.

There was no point in warning the boy. He wouldn't leave Aella alone and maybe Hayes' death would even be in his favor. She would need some comfort and Loki believed he could really give it to her - to some extent. Thor was still blind for the potential hidden inside her and more and more he had the feeling that Brunnhilde didn't  _want_ to be reminded to her abilities. 

The chances were good, he thought. He was on the right track. After all, they only knew each other for two days and she had already introduced him to her mother. 

"It's almost dinner time," the woman noted. "Will you stay for dinner?"

"No," Aella answered, who was suddenly in the doorway again. "We still have a lot to do." She gave him an intrusive look. 

Well, maybe it was indeed better to end this little act, although he had enjoyed it. This afternoon hadn't been that bad. Aella however created the impression that she could crush his bones at the slightest thing, and although he loved her touches, that was a little too much.

"We should indeed go, ma'me. It was nice to meet you." He shook her hand, turning towards Aella. "I'll wait outside."

With a little smirk he kissed her cheek and headed outside. Closing the door behind him, he leaned against the railing of the stairs. He thought about his own mother. She had died, not long after he had discovered that she wasn't his real mother. It hadn't been any less hurtful, he had loved her nonetheless. It was strange to realize that he, because he was adopted himself, shared more similarities with Aella than she understood.


End file.
